Brotherly Baggage
by Leah by Michelangelo
Summary: Another collection of one-shots surrounding the four brothers and their brotherly moments!
1. Little Brothers

**Hey, I can't believe I'm already on the third installment of these collections! Hope you enjoy this. Have fun! I know I did!**

* * *

 **Ch. 1-Little Brothers**

Mikey tossed a bag in the back of the turtle van, smiling. "Aw yeah, boy! He shoots, he scores!"

He turned to a black duffel bag behind him on the floor and glared. "Oh yeah? You want a piece of me? You wanna mess with the Mikester?!" He kicked it up into the air and punched it into the back of the van. "Take that Duffel-breath!"

Michelangelo's baby-blue eyes scanned the room. He chuckled and put his hands on his belt.

Donnie trudged into the room, carrying a stack of blueprints taller than he was. He leaned over so that he could see Mikey's face.

"All done?"

Mikey smiled. "The last of the bags has been vanquished—I mean, packed," he said.

Don rolled his eyes. "I'm sure they were. I hope you didn't break anything this time."

"Nah, 'course not." Mikey said, beaming innocently.

The brainiac wasn't easily fooled. "Uh-huh. Well, I won't be the one explaining to Leo and Raph why their stuff seems to have been mysteriously disorganized."

"Raph's wasn't organized to begin with."

"There's order to even Raph's chaos, Mikey. Even if you and I will never really understand it."

"Yeah, I guess."

A door-slam echoed through the lair and the two younger turtle siblings' good humor dimmed a little. Mikey frowned.

"I don't get those two sometimes, Don. One minute they're so close and the next, they're not even talking to each other. I worry about them."

Donnie slid next to him so their shoulder's touched.

"Don't, Mikey. It's their problem. They'll get over it soon enough like they always do." He said, wanting very much to bonk his two infuriating older siblings over the head. It was one thing when those two fought, those fights put the entire family on edge, but it was something else entirely when those two starting shutting everyone out. Donnie patted his little brother's shoulder.

"Yeah, I guess. Sometimes I wish we could just beat some sense into their heads." Mikey said, wistfully.

Donnie smiled. "That works when they use it on us, Mikey, but I think if we tried it on them, they'd just get angrier."

"There's got to be a way."

The purple-masked turtle didn't like the look on Mikey's face. The youngest was getting far too involved in something that shouldn't even be his fight.

"Let it go, Mikey."

Michelangelo wasn't a very aggressive turtle, not by any means, but he had a temper. If there were two traits the Hamato brothers all shared, it was stubbornness and the ability to blow up in each other's faces if the right buttons were pushed. Donnie had unintentionally prodded one of Mikey's more sensitive ones. The youngster hated being told what he could and could not do. Especially when it came to his family.

"Just because you're a genius, Donnie, doesn't mean you're always right! I'm not an air-head! And I'm not just going to stand by and let this go on. So stick it in your shell!"

Don's jaw dropped. He'd seen Mikey get mad before. He knew how sensitive his younger brother was, but he hadn't expected Mikey to react this way. He was fed up with Leo and Raph's behavior and as a result, he'd decided to keep as far away from them as possible and let them deal with things on their own. On the other hand, maybe Mikey was right. Those two had been avoiding each other all week. Enough was enough.

He sighed at the pouty look on Mikey's face. "I'm sorry, Mikey, I didn't mean—"

Mikey's shoulder's relaxed. "I know. I'm sorry, too, D. I guess the way Leo and Raph have been lately is stressing me out."

"But you're right."

Mikey looked up.

"We do have to do something. Do you have a plan?" Don's brain jarred. Had he really just asked Mikey for a plan? Yes, yes he had, and he was okay with that. Mikey was better at relating to their brothers on the emotional level than he was. Intellect wasn't what was needed here. It was sensitivity.

Mikey bit his lip. "We gotta do it like a turtle do: divide and conquer."

"You sure?" Don asked, his brain immediately running the possibilities.

"Yup."

"So who takes who?"

Mikey frowned and thought it over carefully, his mind picking apart his older brother's personalities. "I'll take Leo. You take Raph."

Donnie blinked. He didn't have a problem with taking Raph, but—he really wasn't used to dealing with the hothead's moods.

"Are you sure?" he asked, uncertain. "You can relate to Raph in a way that I don't usually—"

"Exactly, Don." Mikey interrupted. "Raph and I are emotional, ya know? Squish-squish. But this isn't an emotional problem."

Both of Donatello's eye-ridges rose. "What? How do you know that?"

"Donnie, if something hurts Raph's heart he explodes, he doesn't quietly avoid people. He only does that when he gets stuck on an idea."

"So you think I'll do better with him because I can negate that idea?"

Beaming widely, Michelangelo nodded. "Nobody's better at killing bad ideas than you, Don!"

The brainiac laughed. "I've certainly killed enough of yours over the years."

"Just you wait, bro. One day I'll come up with a master-plan so solid even you won't be able to break it."

"There's always the bro card, Mikey." Don teased.

Sometime during the past couple of years, all Don's refutations of his wild prank or invention ideas had become a challenge to Michelangelo. Since then, he'd made it his mission to come up with an idea so bad it was irrefutable. So far, no success, but he would get there eventually. The bro card was the term Don used for the combined variables of Raph and Leo.

Mikey glared and tackled the brainiac to the floor. He tickled his purple-masked brother's sides and Don chuckled wildly.

"Ahaha! Mikey get off! Get off!" His arms flailed wildly for a few moments before he managed to latch on to Mikey's shell and return fire. Soon, Mikey was laughing hard enough that Don was able to switch their positions.

Mikey squealed and shrieked. "Aaaah! Help! Help! Ahaha. Donnie! Get him off! Get him off! Heh-Heh-HELP!"

Despite Mikey's painfully loud cries, Don held firm. Two pairs of feet came running to the lab and shoved open the door.

Leo rushed to break up what he thought was a fight between his little brother. A hand caught his elbow and yanked him harshly back. He glared over his shoulder at his red-masked sibling.

Raph rolled his eyes. "Let 'em go. They're having fun."

Fun? Leo took a second look. Oh, Michelangelo had a huge smile on his face, so did Donnie. Apparently it was some kind of tickle war. He relaxed and turned to leave. As he did so, his eyes scraped over his hotheaded brother in the doorway. What he saw made him pause.

Raphael was openly smiling, paying absolutely no attention to Leo. A scoff left his lips when Mikey finally tossed Don off and punched him playfully for good measure. He chuckled.

Mikey and Donnie looked up when they heard that familiar chuckle. They hadn't realized that their older brothers were watching them. Seeing the smile on Raph's face made them grin. The youngest looked past Raph over at Leo. Leo was also looking at Raph. He seemed pretty deep in thought, but he also looked like he wanted to say something.

"Raph." Leo called.

Donnie noticed that Raph's shoulders tensed before the hothead responded.

"You need something, Leo?"

"Yeah." Leo said, nodding confidently. "I need to apologize."

If Raph was surprised, he didn't show it. He said nothing. Leo swayed foot-to-foot nervously. Mikey's eyes narrowed. Shell, if those two didn't patch things up right now, he was going to smack them both in the face!

"What I said was unfair to you and completely out of line, so I'm—"

"Ya don't have to apologize." Raph said.

Leo grinned and started to put a hand on Raph's shoulder, but Raph jerked away.

Don bit back a growl. Couldn't those two reconcile simply just once?

"But you ever say anything like that about me or my brothers again and I'll shellac you! I avoided ya this whole week because anyone who'd say something like that to their brother, anger or no anger, doesn't deserve that brother. I ain't asking much, Leo."

"I know. That's why I wanted to say—"

"Don't start. Ya learned yer lesson, I learned mine. For shell's sake, let's just let it go."

Raph and Leo were painfully reminded of their little brothers' presence when a bō staff bonked them both over the head.

"Well, it's about time." Mikey said. His voice was relief, exhaustion, and annoyance all rolled into one.

"I concur. After all, I wouldn't have wanted Mikey to hurt himself trying to pound some sense into you two." Don agreed, putting his bō away.

"Mikey was gonna do that?" Raph asked, smiling.

"You two were driving Donnie and me out of our shells!"

Leo frowned. "Guess I should apologize to you, too. Sorry guys."

"Yeah, same." Raph said.

Leo rolled his eyes, but grinned. Raph wouldn't say sorry unless he had no other option. Fearless had given him the easy way out this time.

Raphael chuckled. His three brothers stared questioningly at him. "Imagine, Leo. The kid brothers trying to get the drop on us." He said, a little patronizingly, though his brothers all recognized it for what it was: teasing.

Don huffed. "In case you didn't notice, we _did_ get the drop on you."

"It'll never happen twice, brainiac."

Mikey's angry face was making it hard for Raph not to crack up. For some reason whenever Mikey made that face he had the overwhelming urge to laugh. Maybe because it was such a poor attempt at mocking his own angry expression. He held the laughter in.

"Oh yeah? Donnie and I want a rematch!"

"Oh yeah?" Raph echoed, leaning over Michelangelo, smirking.

"Yeah!" Mikey asserted.

Raph's neon-green eyes drifted over to his older brother and his smirk intensified. "What do ya say, Leo? Up for a rematch?"

Leo's smirk matched Raph's.

Mikey and Donnie suddenly grew very afraid.

"Um, on second thought, let's just head out to the farmhouse. If we leave now we can get there before it gets light." Don said in a rush, blending some of the words together.

Raph couldn't take it anymore, he burst out laughing. He punched Donnie affectionately in the shoulder. "You should have seen the looks on your faces!"

Leo also doubled over with laughter and had to lean on Raph's shoulder for support.

Mikey smiled past them to look Donnie in the eyes. From behind his big brothers' backs he gave the brainiac a thumbs-up. Donatello smiled and nodded. Mission accomplished, though not the way they'd planned it.

The next thing Leo and Raph knew, they had brothers coming at them from both sides. Raphael blinked and Leo's laughter died down as the two of them were trapped in the center of a group hug.

"I love you, bros." Mikey said, rubbing his face against Leo's carapace.

"Ditto," Don murmured, struggling to keep a grip on Raph, who had a reputation for wiggling his way out of group hugs.

"Aw," Raph said, shifting so that he could pat the back of Donnie's shell. "We love you, too, little brothers."

Leo smiled softly. "You can say that again."

Three turtles cried out as they were unexpectedly thrust backwards. Leo quickly stabilized himself and steadied Mikey and Don to keep them from falling. Raph sighed in relief and turned toward the younger turtles.

"That's better." He said, turning towards them. He lunged. "Now come here, you two!" He shouted, trapping them both into affectionate headlocks.

"Raphie!" They protested.

Leonardo rolled his eyes and started to turn away, but was suddenly yanked back into the fray. He yelped. The chuckle that met his ears wasn't the one he expected. Mikey had a playful and mischievous look on his face.

"Where do you think you're going, Fearless leader?" He asked.

Leo laughed and allowed Mikey to pull him back towards the others and with his help they gradually managed to overthrow the red-masked captor and pin him to the ground so he could get his fair share of tickling. Leo's turn followed soon after, and then Raph and Leo each took a turn at ambushing Mikey and Don.

Mikey laughed whole-heartedly, feeling lighter than ever before. There was nothing, absolutely nothing, better than big brothers.

His brothers were thinking the same thing, but about little brothers.

* * *

 **Review Please! How was it?**


	2. The Missing Mishap

**This is a long chapter, guys, so hold onto your seat-belts and bear with me. (Also some spoilers for the episode: Broken Foot)**

* * *

 **Ch. 2-The Missing Mishap**

"Raph—"

"No, Leo. If I was where Karai is right now. I want vengeance. I'll stop at nothing to get it. In that situation, what would you do?"

Leonardo was silent. Raphael growled and pressed on, leaning into his brother's space.

"As the leader in the situation Leo, what would you do? I'm a vigilante going out on my own and trying to provoke the Shredder. What would you do, Leo?"

"I'd fight you." Leo said, his voice barely louder than the sound of their breath. "I'd have to stop you."

"And if you couldn't?"

"For the good of the team, I'd have to order they dissociate from you. I couldn't let our family get hurt because of your actions."

"Why should it be any different for her?" Raph asked.

The look Leo gave him was all the answer he needed. Damn. He flung up a hand before Leonardo could even open. He sighed.

"Stupid question. Obviously she means more to you than we do."

Leo started to protest, but again, Raph cut him off.

"We're brothers, Leo, family. We're all we've got. And no matter how hard you try to believe it, Karai isn't ready for that yet. She's gone revenge crazy. Sooner or later you're going to have to make a choice big brother. You'll have to decide who comes first: Karai or us."

"There is no choice. My brothers always come first." Leo said.

Raph scoffed and shook his head. He had a faraway look in his eyes.

"Maybe that's what you tell yourself now. But when the time comes, it'll hit you hard, like a punch straight to the plastron," said Raph, sighing. "Heart wants what the heart wants. I had to learn that the hard way."

Leo slid closer to Raph and reached up to put a hand on his shoulder, but the hothead jerked away.

"We had to go back. We had to save Earth." Raph bowed his head. The uncomfortable silence that followed was broken when Raph finally went on. "Maybe you're right, Leo. Maybe there was no real choice...but shell, it sure felt like it."

"Raph, you did the right thing."

"How the shell can you know that, Leo?!"

Leo was appalled into silence by the wetness in Raph's eyes. The notion that Raph had considered parting from them was jarring enough. If the leader had known about Raph's struggle at the time he would have done all he could, fought, if necessary, to make Raph stay with them. Just like Raph was fighting him now.

"We left her behind, probably to be killed at the hands of Lord Dregg and his minions. Even if she is alive, she's probably moved on, settled with one of her own kind. She's gone. I'll probably never see her again." Raphael straightened. "Maybe I'll never stop wondering about that 'what if'. It'll probably haunt me for the rest of my life, but I made my decision. I put my brothers first."

Leo couldn't stop the growl the rose up from inside him. "And I suppose you're going to say that's what a leader does?"

How many times was Raphael going to bombard him like this? To lecture him, the leader, on what a leader could and could not do. Like Raph knew the job of a leader better than he did, like he deserved it more, like he—

The hostility in Leonardo's voice crawled under Raph's shell and across his shoulders, but instead of being angry, he grew cold as stone. Raph stood and turned his back on his big brother, his parting words hanging in his wake:

"No. That's what a brother does."

* * *

"Hey Mikey," Don called, from underneath the Shell Raiser. Mikey was leaning against it devouring some lunch, pizza, of course.

"Mhm?" Mikey said, his mouth full of cheesy goodness.

"Ever notice how different we all are?"

"Well—hmpf mmm—yeah, bro." Mikey swallowed the last of his pizza and went on, excitedly, "I'm the cute one who keeps us together, you're the genius who helps solve all our problems, Raph's the hothead who inspires us to never give up, Leo's the leader who gives us confidence to—"

"Not that, Mikey. I meant we've changed since we, well, you know, went to space."

Mikey rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah, I guess. I feel like you guys appreciate me more. I can be me, ya know?"

"And you couldn't before?" Donnie slid out from under the Shell Raiser and frowned up at his little brother.

Suddenly, Mikey seemed very somber. "I could, but you guys always judged me. I mean, you still do, I guess, but—it's different. You guys are a lot more accepting of who I am now and you let me do my thing without yelling at me for it. It's nice."

Donnie stood and put a hand on Mikey's shoulder. "Mikey, after going inside your mind to save you from those neutrinos, I think we all realized how special you are and how much you mean to us."

"Aww, thanks D." Mikey threw his arms around Donnie and hugged him tight. He smiled brightly and released his big brother. "You changed too, D."

"Oh really?" Don raised an eye-ridge.

"Yeah, you're like three times awesomer!"

Don gave him a look. Mikey smiled.

"Not that you weren't awesome already, but you like totally killed it out in space, Don! It didn't matter that you do didn't know all that whatchamacallit about space stuff, you still made all those cool inventions and repaired the Fugitoid!"

Smiling in the face of Mikey's child-like excitement, Don said, "Thanks Mikey."

"Raph changed, too." Mikey said, rattling on. "He opened up a little, stopped acting like a tough guy all the time. And every time I missed home or needed a pat on the shell, Raph was right there to give to me because Leo—"

That was where Mikey's cheer ran out. Don also frowned. He took up where his little brother had left off.

"Leo almost seemed to change for the worse."

"He scares me Don."

The brainiac immediately noticed that Mikey's eyes were fixed on his bandages. "Mikey..."

"The way he always runs off to face danger on his own was bad enough before, Don. Space made it worse. It's like he thinks he can just—like it wouldn't even hurt us. And now this whole vengeance thing he's doing with Karai—and then you got hurt."

"Mikey...it's okay." Don tried to hug his little brother, but Mikey wasn't having it.

"It's not okay, Don! Maybe Karai is our long-lost sis, but it's like Leo's prepared to give everything, even us, up for this vengeance kick of hers! And that's not cool, bro!"

With a sigh, the brainiac looked off to the side. "Mikey you know how he feels about her."

"So?!" Mikey shouted so loudly that Don had to take a step back. "You don't see me dressing up like a Foot and putting myself in danger because of my thing for Shini!"

"Mikey, it's more than that. Leo and Karai have a bond—"

"So did Raph and Mona. He made a hard choice, Don. It would have been so easy for him to ditch us and help Sal and Mona save their people, but he didn't. He stayed with us." Mikey sighed and all traces of residual anger vanished from his body. "I get why Leo did what he did, I really do, Don. He wanted to do what he thought was right, I get that, but as soon as one of us gets hurt, that crosses the line."

"You sound like Raph." Don murmured.

Mikey grinned sadly. The grin faded and he sighed, staring at the wall. "You know Don, since we went to space, I keep getting this weird feeling whenever Raph and Leo argue."

"Like it's all for nothing?" Don asked, his voice tired. Both of them were fed-up with hearing their older brothers' disagreements. He was surprised when Mikey shook his head.

"No. Like they've swapped places."

Don's eye-ridges rose. His mind poured over several of Raph and Leo's latest arguments. He hadn't really noticed before, but Mikey was right. The older turtles' standpoints had been reversed.

Staring at the wall like it was the New York skyline, Mikey whispered, "Sometimes, Don, I think Raph is acting more like the leader."

The purple-masked turtle gave Mikey a dubious look.

"Raph led the plan to find out what Leo was doing and afterwards...Donnie—I've seen Raph blame himself for stuff before, but that wasn't Raph's 'I-blame-myself-face', Don. It was Leo's."

Donnie couldn't attest to that. He'd been completely knocked out, but he knew what Raph's 'blame-face' looked like and he knew what Leo's looked like. Mikey was a facial-expression aficionado, there was no way the youngest could be wrong. If Space had matured Raph into a leader...was it possible that it had pushed Leo into becoming a rebel?

Without Splinter's watchful guidance Leo had floundered, falling into a sea of doubt and denial. Mona Lisa had grounded Raphael, given him an outlet, and boosted his confidence during that difficult time. Raph felt more comfortable displaying sensitivity and providing his brother's with the reassurance and emotional support that they needed, while Leo was still caught up in doubt.

The more he thought about it, the more Donatello realized that even Leo still gave the orders, he looked to Raph for confirmation.

Mikey read his mind. "So you see it too?"

"I don't know how I didn't see it before."

"That's what I'm here for, D. Pointing out all the stuff that you, Raph, and Leo can't see."

"Well, oh Divine Seer Michelangelo, has anyone ever told you how ridiculously childish, absurdly brilliant, and wonderfully observant you are?"

Mikey glowed at his big brother's praise. "Why no, they haven't."

"Then you can count this the first time. You're the best little brother ever."

Mikey threw a hand on his plastron and posed like a celebrity, saying, "Thanks, I get that a lot."

Don laughed and bonked him affectionately on the head.

"Ow! Hey, is that any way to treat 'the best little brother ever'?"

Mischievousness spread across Donatello's face. "Key words: 'little brother'."

With over-the-top acting, Mikey pretended to be stricken. "You're so mean to me."

Donnie bonked him over the head again, getting him in a headlock so he couldn't escape. "It's just how we show affection."

Mikey rolled his eyes. "Big brothers," he said, exhaustedly, "they're so sappy."

The garage became silent. The silence seemed to creep into them both and they shuddered.

"Hey Don?"

"Yeah, Mikey?" Don looked down at his younger brother. Mikey's face looked weary.

"Let's go."

Don canted his head. "And do what?"

Mikey shrugged. "I don't know. Something. Anything as long as we can get away from the big-bros for a couple of hours."

Inside, Don was inclined to agree. Tensions between Raph and Leo were bound to be high for the next couple of hours. Getting away would be good for both of them.

"You know what, Mikey? I think that's a fabulous idea."

* * *

Raphael couldn't sleep. He kept dreaming of Mona Lisa. He was used to it, though. He hadn't been sleeping very well since they got back from space. There was a light on in the lab. He sighed.

His brothers really needed to stop testing his patience. It had been four hours since his fight with Leo. And now Don was trying to pull an all-nighter even though he was still recovering from injuries. According to Master Splinter, the brainiac was mostly recovered. He had a few bandages, but those were just precautionary. The cuts would heal just fine in a day or two.

Raph poked his head in the lab, ready to shout at the top of his lungs, but he stopped dead in the doorway. It was empty. Why the shell was the light on if it was empty? He went in and looked around.

Don's toolbox was lying open next to the Shell Raiser. Don didn't just leave things out like that. He'd only do that if he'd been distracted...seriously distracted. Raph saw the telltale greasy fingerprints on the Shell Raiser. His eyes narrowed. Mikey.

So Mikey had distracted Don and then they'd both gone—where?

If they were in the main room or the kitchen he would have seen them. His eyes raked over the lab one last time as he left, closing the door behind him. He headed straight for his younger brother's rooms. Both were empty, and all of their gear was gone: t-phones, weapons, and grappling hooks.

Shell. He forced down the angry panic that was slowly taking hold of him and stomped to the dojo just to make sure they weren't there.

They'd gone out. Those idiotic little punks! They'd left the lair without even telling him, which meant they probably hadn't told Splinter or Leo either. Splinter and Splinter Jr. would never have let Don go out after he'd just recovered from an injury.

Dammit all.

Splinter would freak if he found out. Leo would freak and tell Splinter. He was on his own, but if his little brothers were in trouble, he'd need backup. He called Casey first. All he told the human was that he wanted to hang out and kick some butt. Casey had a hockey game tonight. Damn.

He called the Mighty Mutanimals. Slash didn't answer, so he left a message. Asking Karai was out of the question. If he did, he'd be sucked into her revenge issues, and probably only put his family in more danger. He couldn't just go after his little brothers without backup. If he did and something happened...

Ugh. He'd have to go with his least favorite option at the moment.

Seconds later he was knocking on Leo's door.

The eldest turtle opened it just enough to glare at him. "If you've come to fight some more you can just—"

"I ain't here to fight ya, Leo. We've already done that too much, and now we seem to be paying for it." Raph growled a little, clenching his fists.

Leo's door opened wider. "What do you mean?"

"It's Mikey and Don. They're gone."

"Gone?! Gone where?" Leo was standing paralyzed in the doorway.

"Shell if I know. Obviously they didn't tell us." Then, bitterly, he added, "Guess they decided to go on a vigilante spree of their own."

Leo's expression darkened. He took command. "We need to tell Master Splinter and get April. She can track them."

"No." Raph grabbed Leo's shoulder and forcibly held him back.

"What the shell do you mean, no?!"

Though there was a hint of anger twitching on his lips, Raph's face was cool and collected.

"The only reason Mikey and Don would leave without telling us is cause they were fed up with the way we were acting."

Leo felt himself growing calmer as he stared deep into Raph's level-headed eyes. He slowly realized his brother was right. The only way to get their younger brothers back was if they worked together. Without fighting.

"Where do we start?" he asked.

Raphael placed a hand on his shoulder. Leo couldn't pull his eyes away from his immediate younger brother's face. He'd never seen Raph look so forceful. "The lab. April isn't the only tracker in this family."

Leo blinked. It was true. Though they had been relying on April's tracking skills more and more often lately, he had always been highly skilled at tracking his little brothers down. He nodded and even found himself shooting an appreciative grin at Raphael.

Raph rolled his eyes and smacked Leo's arm.

They both grabbed their gear and headed for the lab. Once there, the first thing they did was use Don's computer to trace the location of their little brothers' t-phones. No need to kill themselves searching if the answer was simple. No signal. Worry seeped into their muscles, making them tense. Raph asked a question that he knew Leo would already have the answer to.

"How long ago did they leave?"

Deep blue eyes slid over to meet Raph's.

"As near as I can tell...three or four hours."

"Shell."

Leo agreed. Don and Mikey weren't always as responsible as they could be, but they weren't reckless. There was no way they'd leave without telling anyone and be out for more than two hours. Not unless something had happened to them.

* * *

Don's eyelids opened slowly. He yawned and stretched. His movement made the figure beside him whine and stir. He smiled down at Michelangelo and began to fall back asleep when he realized: we aren't home. He shot up and looked around frantically.

"Nuh, ten more minutes..." Mikey said softly.

Donnie shook his little brother by the shoulder. "Mikey. Mikey, wake up."

"Don? What's up bro?"

"We fell asleep."

"Huh?"

"We left the lair, remember? We came here and talked and then I guess we fell asleep."

"Oh." Mikey said, Donnie's words were slowly jogging his memory. "Right." He paused. "What were we talking about again?"

"Not now, what time is it?" Don asked, taking out his t-phone so he could check the time. "Oh shell!"

"What?"

"It's almost four in the morning." Don's eyes were wide and scared. If Raph and Leo found out they were gone, they were probably frantic by now. "We gotta get back to the lair!"

Mikey jumped up and nodded, looking just as worried as Don felt. "You said it, bro."

As they made sure they'd got everything, Mikey glanced nostalgically at the old room they were in. "Hey D, remember when the four of used to come here as kids and play?"

Though he was still frantic, Don calmed for a moment and looked around. "Yeah. That was fun."

"We gotta get Leo and Raph to come do this with us sometime. Just come here and talk."

Don's shoulders drooped. "They'd probably just think it was stupid."

Mikey shook his head. "No, they wouldn't. Raph might say that, but he wouldn't, not really. He'd just be acting tough."

"They're going to kill us when we get home."

"No way, D. They'd miss us too much." Mikey smiled, patting Don's shoulder as they left the abandoned water-testing facility.

Don smiled too; glad to know Michelangelo was always there for him.

* * *

Leo and Raph jumped rooftops at an uncharted speed. They both knew they were breaking their personal records, but neither of them could bring themselves to care. Leo's eyes occasionally darted over to Raph. The hothead had always claimed he could be faster than the leader if he put his mind to it. Since there was a complete absence of gloating, Raphael clearly hadn't realized that he had been a step in the lead this entire time.

Leo's face hardened. Raph looked calm but this was the third time his step had faltered near the edge of a dangerously tall building. They kept on running. At the building's edge, Raph's footing gave and his legs slipped out from under him.

Heart ringing in his ears, Leo lunged forward, caught his sibling by the wrist, and yanked Raph back to safety. His hands rested on Raph's shoulders as he stared down into Raph's eyes.

"Raphael, this has to stop. I know you're worried about Mikey and Donnie, but pull yourself together. They're ninjas and damn good ones. Losing our cool and getting ourselves killed isn't going to help at all."

"Depends on your point of view, turtles." A smooth accented voice said.

Raph's hands flew to his sais, and Leo reached for his katana.

Fishface, Rahzar, Bebop and Rocksteady stood on the other side of the rooftop.

"Da. For us, you getting killed is good thing," the rhino drawled.

Rahzar rolled his eyes. "As if it wasn't obvious, moron."

"Who you calling the moron, Volk?" Rocksteady glared.

"Enough with the chit-chat, yo. I wanna get me some turtle. Oooh-hoo." Bebop sing-songed as he charged.

Leo and Raph split, jumping in opposite directions. Bebop went after Leo, and Rahzar joined him, while Raph took Fishface and Rocksteady. Jumping down into the alley, Raph became one with the shadows.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are, turtle. Or I'll blow your brother away," said Fishface. He tossed a handful of un-activated Stockman grenades up in the air so that, wherever Raphael was, they could be seen.

Threatening Leo was a mistake. Raph was already worried and angry about the missing brothers situation. At Fishface's threat, all of Raph's emotions focused and took perfect aim. He shot out like a bullet from a gun and back-flipped to give Fishface a harrowing kick to the jaw.

"Not by the scales on my chiny-chin-chin." He growled, spitefully.

Fishface was knocked out.

Raph dropped his guard. He shouldn't have. A battle cry and the sound of heavy feet rushing toward him was the only warning he had. Pain. An explosion of pain in his side. He screamed, and everything went dark.

Leo heard Raph's scream. His eyes brightened in panic. He called his brother's name and started to move. There was the sound of an explosion, the building shook, and concrete started to crumble. The last thing he remembered was falling.

* * *

The lair was quiet. Donnie and Mikey snuck quietly past Splinter's room and into the lab. The light was still on. They had half expected their notoriously overprotective big brothers to be in there waiting for them, pacing like impatient fathers. That was usually how things went in their family. Leo and Raph, as the strongest fighters, had always taken Mikey and Donnie's safety as their responsibility. But there was no one here. They looked at each other. Mikey smiled.

"There, ya see, Don? They didn't even know we were gone."

Donnie wasn't so sure. For all they knew, Leo and Raph could be watching and waiting for the right moment to spring out. He looked around the lab. Something caught his eyes.

"My computer. It wasn't on when I left." He said, his worry starting to take hold. His fingers danced across the keyboard as he entered his password. His tracking program for their t-phones was open and their signals were coming in loud and clear. They were both in the lair. "But if Leo and Raph tracked our t-phones, how come they never found us."

Mikey was starting to look worried. He shrugged. "Think maybe we were too deep in the sewers?"

Don frowned. Mikey might just have hit on exactly the problem.

"So, if they got no signal, they must have thought we were in trouble."

"And gone out to look for us." Mikey said, getting scared. "What'll we do, Donnie?"

"We need to find them."

* * *

Little, nine-year-old Leo trudged through the sewers. It was spring and it had been raining a lot recently, so the water was higher. It was dangerous to be out here alone, but he was looking for someone. He heard a high-pitched sniffle and he turned down the side tunnel that would lead him to the abandoned water-testing facility. There he found his little brother curled up in a ball, orange mask wet with tears.

"Mikey?"

"Go away Leo. Leave me alone."

"We're not supposed to be out here alone. You know Splinter's rules."

More tears streamed down Mikey's face. "I'm sick of rules, Leo! I hate them! It's all about the rules! It's never about us, Leo!"

"Mikey—"

"I wanna go up top, Leo. I want a friend."

Leo sighed and sat down next to his little brother tossing an arm over Mikey's shaking shoulders. "Mikey, tell me what a friend does."

Mikey sniffled and thought about it. "A friend is someone who plays and laughs with you, who listens when you talk and helps you with your problems, who gives you hugs when you need them. And who's always nice to you."

Leo shook his head. "No Mikey, a true friend is someone who tells you the truth, even if it isn't something you want to hear. That's what Master Splinter says."

"Okay Leo." Mikey said, softly nodding his head.

"Mikey, who plays and laughs with you?"

Mikey blinked at his big brother and answered. "Raphie, D, and you. Sometimes Splinter."

"And who listens when you need to talk?"

"You, D, Raphie, and Splinter."

"And what about when you need hugs?"

"You, D, Raphie, and Splinter."

"And who can you trust to tell you the truth?"

"You, D, and Splinter." Mikey said.

Leo raised an eye-ridge.

"Raphie makes up scary stories." Mikey explained.

Leo laughed a little. "But you trust Raphie, right?"

Mikey nodded emphatically. "Yeah, Raphie gives good hugs."

"You still want a friend, little brother? Because it sounds like you have four really good ones."

"But Master Splinter's our dad." Mikey said, frowning.

"Okay, then three really good ones."

"But you're my brothers." Mikey was confused.

"Who said that brothers can't be friends?"

It was like Leo had lifted away part of the barrier between Mikey and the world above. His little brother's face lit up and Mikey hugged him so tightly he could barely breathe.

"Thanks, Leo! You're my best friend!"

Leo hugged back as tightly as he could, patting Mikey's shell softly.

Suddenly, the image blurred, his vision swirled. He groaned in pain. What the...where, where was he?

* * *

Donnie had goaded him into it. It wasn't his idea. But a stick had whacked him over the head and, the next thing he knew, a voice was shouting:

"Can't catch me, Raphie!"

And then they were off. Donnie in the lead, his long legs making him hard to keep up with. Once again Raph could feel anger bubbling at the fact that he was the shortest of his brothers. They were constantly giving him grief for it. Shell, he was only three centimeters shorter than Mikey. Three stinkin' centimeters. Ooh, when he got bigger they were gonna be sorry they ever made fun of his size.

He chased after Don as fast as he could, not really noticing that his brother had taken the chase out of the lair and into the sewers. As long as they stuck to the buddy system, they wouldn't get in trouble. It wasn't until Donnie started weaving his way down tunnels Raph was unfamiliar with that the little hothead started getting suspicious. He slowed down and called after his racing brother.

"Donnie, where the shell are you going?"

Donnie smiled and came back to take his hand and pull him along. "Come on, it's just a bit further."

They walked in silence for a few more minutes until Raph said, "You did this on purpose. To get me to come with you."

Don smiled and Raph knew he was right.

He growled. "What the shell was so important that you couldn't just ask me?"

"Cause if I'd asked, you wouldn't have come."

"I might have." Raph said.

Donnie looked at him.

Raph sighed. "Okay, fine, I would've said no, but I might've thought about it." There was another short silence and Raph asked, "Why didn't ya ask the others? They probably would have wanted to come with ya."

"I didn't want to come with them. I wanted to come with you."

"Why?" Raph asked, genuinely surprised.

"Because you're more fun. I like to play with you. Leo would just be going on and on about how Splinter says not to go too far, and Mikey would be asking annoying questions. You're smart and funny."

Raph blinked owlishly at Donnie. "I'm not smart. Master Splinter says my spelling is all wrong."

"So? You're smart in other ways. You're smart about engines, and sports, and which parts of the sewers are too dangerous, and you're strong in training—"

Raph sighed. "That ain't smart Donnie, that's just stuff."

"It is smart! It is! In your own way!" Donnie insisted.

Looking away, eight-year old Raphael blinked back happy tears. "Thanks Dondon."

His brother's arms wrapped tightly around his small, emerald green frame, "You're welcome, Raphie."

Donnie pulled out of the hug far too soon and bounded into a large room. "Look! Look! We're here!" he said excitedly.

Raph looked around the big room. He looked at Donnie, who was standing very close to the edge of the grating. "Okay, so what are we here for?"

SPLASH!

Donatello had fallen into the water.

"Donnie! Donnie!" Raph shouted, rushing to the end of the grating and diving down into the water to save his brother. He opened his eyes and almost lost his air. Donatello was plastron up, grinning and waving at him. He blinked in astonishment. His eyes darted around the pool of water they were in and he realized: it was clean.

Clear pools were few and far between. This was the only one Raph had ever seen besides the one at the entrance of the lair. Donnie had brought him here to swim. He smiled and floated to the surface so that he could peel off his mask. Donnie came up to do the same and Raph seized the opportunity. He tackled his little brother. Donnie shrieked and started splashing around. Raph smiled. He made sure his little brother was able to take a big breath and hold it before he pulled the younger turtle under.

When they finally crawled out of the pool more than an hour later, both of them were exhausted, sleepy, and happier than they had been in a long time. They made their way back to the lair, where they buried themselves in a pile of blankets and took a three-hour nap.

The dream faded.

Raphael's eyes screwed shut tighter. His head felt like someone had been stomping on it. What the shell had happened? He tried to sit up, but he fell back down as a horrible pain erupted in his side. Agh! Right. Rocksteady. The rubble on and around him shifted as he squirmed. Wait.

Rubble? He shot up way too fast. His side screamed in pain and he bit down on his tongue so hard it bled. He looked around though a pained haze. Half the building was gone, blown to pieces.

Leo! Where was Leo? He tried to stand, but there was something heavy pinning his left leg. He reached down and lifted it up as much as he could and started to wiggle his way out. But it was too heavy. He couldn't hold it much longer. His arms gave out.

Something under the heavy piece of concrete shifted and Raphael realized something else: his leg was bleeding...a lot.

* * *

Leo pushed himself up and rubbed his aching forehead. His eyes adjusted to the dim light of the surroundings. There was rubble all around him, in fact there were several very large pieces above him. His fingers dug into the cracks where very low amounts of light were starting to seep through. He pried the pieces apart and emerged from the rubble, slowly rising to his feet to look at what was left of the warehouse. It wasn't much.

He groaned and pressed a hand to his aching plastron. Already there were several dark bruises forming. He had small cuts on his arms and he knew he had hit his forehead pretty hard, but it didn't seem to be bleeding which was good. Wait...

Where was Raph?! Raph!

His eyes frantically scanned the warehouse and realized that since the ceiling had caved in, he was inside. Raph had been outside in the alley—where the explosion—No!

He carefully moved across the warehouse, and exited through a broken window. The alley was a mess. There was no sign of Shredder's henchmen. They must have had injuries of their own to tend to. Still, he didn't want to jinx it. Quietly, he called to his brother.

"Raph! Raph are you here?"

Raphael blinked up at the lightening morning sky. He must be hallucinating. He'd just heard Leo's voice. But what if...

"Leo?" He whispered.

Leo's head shot up. It was so faint it could have been the wind, but he was certain it wasn't. He knew it was Raph. He just knew it.

"Raph?"

"Leo." Came the breathy call.

Leo followed it over to where a big piece of concrete had fallen. His heart leapt. Raph! Raph was alive.

"Raph!" Leo exclaimed, not caring that dawn was swiftly approaching. Then he saw his brother's status. He knelt by Raph's side, tilting the hothead's face in his direction Raph smiled at him, eyes sparkling with relief.

"Leo, yur okay?"

"Yeah, some nasty bruises but I'm okay. How are you?" The leader could already tell he wouldn't really like the answer.

"Hit mah head. Muh leg's bleedin'."

Leo glared at the fallen concrete pinning Raph's left leg. "I'll get you out, but I'm gonna need your help."

Raph nodded.

"When I say move, move, okay?"

Raph nodded again, his green eyes darkening a little. Leo bent down and carefully slid his arms under the concrete, making sure not to cut himself on whatever had cut Raph's leg. He lifted it up. Sweat beaded on his brow and he choked out:

"Move, Raph!"

Raphael did. He slid out from under the debris as quickly as he could.

Once Leo was sure Raphael was completely clear, he dropped the concrete with a loud thud. Then he saw Raph's leg. His face paled. That was a lot of blood. Shell.

Raphael sat up and smiled at him. "Thanks, Leo."

Leo nodded and bent down, slipping one arm under Raph's knees and the other under his shoulders. Raph protested, but Leo wasn't having it.

"Put me down. I can do it myself!"

"No, you can't." Leo said. "You've lost a lot of blood, Raph. I'm getting you back to the lair. Pull up one of your kneepads and apply pressure. Can you do that?"

"'Course I can." Raph grumbled, doing as his older brother suggested. He grimaced. "Shell, that hurts."

"Just hold on." Leo ordered, rushing to the nearest manhole cover. Getting down the ladder with Raph in tow was tricky, but he managed.

"Shell." Raph grunted as Leo jostled him on the final step down.

Guilt and worry washed over the eldest. "Sorry."

"'S okay."

Nothing about this situation was even remotely okay.

Raph seemed to read his mind. "I ain't dyin', Leo. Relax."

"Tall order, little brother." Leo murmured. He was getting more worried by the minute. Raph seemed to be getting sleepier. There had to be something he could say to keep Raph awake.

"Eh, Leo?"

Apparently Raph hadn't given up on their conversation just yet, which made Leo extremely grateful.

"Yes Raph?"

"Did we find Donnie and Mikey?" he asked.

Leo shook his head, as he continued to proceed as quickly as he could toward the lair. "No, we didn't."

One of Raph's hands tightly gripped the rim of Leo's plastron near his shoulder.

"Gotta find 'em, Leo. We just gotta find 'em. They're mah little brothers."

"They're my little brothers, too."

"I love 'em, Leo. Ya just gotta find 'em. I need 'em."

"So do I, Raphie," said Leo, his voice very quiet.

"What did ya dream about, Leo?"

"Huh?" Leo said, confused.

"After the 'splosion. What'd ya dream 'bout?" Raph yawned, blinking sleepily. "I dreamed 'bout when we were little, 'n Don and I went swimming in the clear water pool. Was fun."

"I dreamed about when we were little, too." Leo stared straight ahead, though he knew Raph was looking at him. "A time when Mikey and I sat and talked in the sewers."

Raph's voice sounded scared when he asked, "Ya think they're okay?"

"I don't know, Raph, I really don't know."

"We need 'em. We really need 'em, Leo. Can't do it without 'em. Can't do it just you and me. We need Donnie and Mikey. Always needed 'em." Raph's eyelids began to droop.

"Raph, I need you to stay awake for me." Leo chided.

Raph's eyes opened a little. "Leo...did ya find 'em?"

"No, Raph."

Leo's heart trembled in his chest as Raph's eyes started to close once again. "Raph!"

Slightly awakened once again, Raph stared at him. "Did ya find 'em?" He drawled.

Leo did the only thing he could think of to keep Raph awake. It was cruel and unfair to prey upon his brother's weakness in this state, but it was the only way. He nodded his head.

"Yeah, Raph. I found them. I sent them home, they'll be at the lair waiting for us. But I need you to promise me you'll stay awake so that you can see them, okay?"

To Leo's relief Raphael nodded.

"Gotta stay awake."

"Yeah, Raph. Stay awake."

"Can I talk to you some more?"

"Of course you can."

"How'd you find 'em?" Raph asked.

Leo just let words fall out of his mouth. "I realized that they'd probably only been gone a little bit and that by the time we went out, they'd be back. They've been at the lair the entire time we were out little brother, there was no need to worry."

"They're okay?"

"They're perfectly fine." Every lie burned the tip of Leo's tongue, but it wouldn't be much longer now. The lair door was in sight. He rushed to it and shoved inside.

"Master Splinter!" he shouted, desperately. The old rat came running out of the dojo, accompanied by two other familiar figures. Leo gasped.

"Mikey...Don..."

At the sound of his little brothers' names, Raph looked over at them. He let out a weak sigh of relief and smacked Leo's plastron lazily. "Thanks big brother." He said softly.

Splinter's ears dropped when he saw the blood on Raph's leg. He looked Leo sternly in the eyes. "Dojo, quickly!"

Once Raph's bleeding wound was cleaned, stitched and bandaged, Leo stretched out by his side and soon fell asleep.

* * *

When he woke up, his arms were wrapped in bandages and his head ached. He was lying on his bed.

Raph! Where was Raph? And what about Donnie and Mikey? Were they really home? Or had he imagined seeing them at Splinter's side?

"Where are my little brothers?" He said, trying to push himself up onto his elbows and finding it considerably more difficult than it should have been. His head spun.

"One of 'em is right here, Fearless Leader."

Spinning head forgotten, he sat up in bed and turned towards the door.

"Raph! You're alive."

"Of course I am, ya dork! Gotta hobble around on these stupid crutches a few more days, though. How ya feeling?" Raph asked, limping over to the bed, crutches clicking as he went.

Leo scooted over a little so Raph could sit next to him.

"I'm swimming," he said.

"You mean yur head is swimming." Raph corrected.

"Same thing."

Raph grinned a little, but his grin faded. "Yeah. Don says you had a nasty concussion. Mine wasn't half as bad as yours. We've been waitin' for you to wake up."

Leo only care about two words in those few sentences. "Don? We? They're—"

Raph threw up a hand to silence Leo's frantic questioning. "They're fine. They went to that old water refinement facility, ya know, the one we used to play in when we were kids. Fell asleep. By the time they got back, we were already gone. Your lies just about rounded out to the truth."

Leo stared wide-eyed at his sibling. Raph smiled.

"What, ya think I can't tell when you're lying?"

"Hey, what's goin' on in here—Leo!" Mikey exclaimed, rushing over and tackling his big brother, enthusiastically.

Groaning at the initial impact, Leo relaxed and returned Mikey's embrace, a piece of his heart falling back into place at the feeling of his little brother right here, alive and well. Donatello peeked inside the room, cautiously, but as soon as he saw Leo, the brainiac acted much the same was as Mikey.

"Leo! Thank goodness you're awake, that concussion really scared us. How do you feel? Do you remember us? What's your name? How old are you? Where are we?"

Leo rolled his eyes. "Like I could forget my own brothers. My name is Leonardo, I'm 16, and I live in the New York City sewers in a place called the lair. And I have two little brothers named Donatello and Michelangelo who have a lot of explaining to do and a lot of things to answer for!"

Donnie and Mikey exchanged fearful glances.

"Raph has already told me where you were, what you were doing and why you ended up staying out so late. What I want to know is why didn't you tell us you were going out? A note, a voicemail, anything?"

"We should have done that. We're very sorry, Leo, but Mikey and I were fed up with the way you've been running off on your own all the time so we thought we'd give you a taste of your own medicine. We had no intention of staying out so late and we had no idea that you'd go out looking for us and get—"

The eldest turtle could hear the sincerity in Donnie's voice and when he glanced over at Mikey, he saw tears in the youngest turtle's eyes. They were scared. Terrified and blaming themselves. Leo sighed. Their reasons for leaving were understandable. They certainly had shown him the panic, pain and confusion that not knowing a brother's whereabouts could cause. He lowered his eyes and smacked both of his little brothers in the face.

They stared at him with wide eyes. Two tears slipped out and tumbled down his cheeks as he yanked them into his arms.

"Promise me that you will never do anything like that again."

Mikey and Donnie looked at each other and said, "Only if you do."

Leo sighed and looked down. "Fine."

"We promise." The two youngest said in sync.

"But that does not mean you two get away without punishment." A deep, powerful voice said from behind them.

They turned to their rat-father, who was standing in the doorway with his hands crossed in front of his chest. Mikey and Donnie leaned timidly against Leo. He grinned and shoved them forward, leaving them to their fate.

Raph enjoyed the sight and began to get up, hissing at the vicious pain in his side. Don said he had at least three bruised ribs. His shell had been badly dented. It hurt every time he walked, or sat down, or laughed, or breathed. Shell it hurt. He winced.

Leo reached out, concerned. His hand came dangerously close to Raph's injured side. The hothead swatted it away, reflexively.

Splinter could sense his son's pain and his ears drooped a little. His gaze fell upon his youngest sons awaiting their punishment. A solution presented itself. He walked over to Donatello and Michelangelo and placed his hands on their shoulders.

"My sons, indirectly due to your actions, your brother has received a very grievous injury." He said, eyeing Raphael. His red-masked son blinked.

"Hai Sensei." Donnie and Mikey chorused. Their faces contorted with guilt.

"Therefore, you will cater to your brother's needs without question for the remainder of his recovery."

Leo smiled at their little brothers' astonished and horrified faces. Raph's diabolical smirk probably wasn't helping at all. He grinned. That was Raph's plotting look. The hothead was going to make their little brothers pay for scaring them so badly. Maybe if he asked nicely enough, Raph would let him in on it, too.

* * *

 **How was it? Review Please!**


	3. Midnight Knocking

**Short and sweet. Enjoy!**

 **This one takes place after the latest episode: Mutant Gangland.**

* * *

 **Ch. 3-Midnight Knocking**

Knock. Knock. Knock.

A heavy, forest-green eyelid lifted, and a blue eye glanced through the darkness towards the backlit surface of his door. Ugh. What now? As if this day hadn't been long enough. Raph's stroke of 'independence', Donnie getting captured, an evil mobster who aimed to wipe mutant-kind off the face of the planet…What could possibly be going on that was so important as to warrant the interruption of a much needed sleep? He thought, his feet carrying his sleep-heavy body to the door.

Knock. Knock.

He opened his mouth to ask who it was and what they wanted, but the culprit beat him to it.

"L-Leo? Are you awake?"

He sighed and pried open the door.

"Am now," he said. A small tinge of annoyance colored his thick, sleepy voice.

Michelangelo face turned guiltily to the floor. "Sorry. I shouldn't have—"

"Well, I'm up now," Leo yawned, fighting to keep his eyes from closing. "Say what ya need to say, Mikey."

The youngest turtle rubbed his arm and shifted his weight, never looking up from the lair floor.

"I—I couldn't sleep." He whispered.

Leo's eyes opened fully and his back straightened. Tired or not, his brothers came first. His right hand reached out and tilted Mikey's chin up. Mikey still wouldn't look at him.

"It's okay, little brother. You're safe." He cooed, softly. Mikey's eyes were still closed. Leo leant down a little, "C'mon, Mikey, let me see those baby blues."

Mikey sniffled. He looked up at his big brother's gentle, comforting face and his baby-blue irises drowned in tears. A cross between a sob and a relieved sigh left his mouth.

The next thing Leo knew, he had a hundred and fifty pounds of little brother clinging to his plastron. He hushed Mikey's sobs and led his younger brother into his room, sitting the youngest down on the bed. The hall light pouring in through the open door was enough for him to clearly see Mikey's face.

"Mikey?" he asked softly, probing for an explanation.

"L-L-Leo…I'm scared."

His arms wrapped tightly around Mikey's shoulders.

"You don't have to be scared, little brother. You're safe now." Leo rattled off, remotely, sensing that Mikey was spooked by their latest escapade. "It's okay. We're all safe."

"For now."

Leo's eye-ridges drew together sadly. He sighed. If only he could disagree.

"So you know it, too! You know it and you still say it's okay." Mikey sobbed. "This time Raphie almost got killed, Leo. Donnie could've been dissected!"

"We're family Mikey. As long as we look out for each other, we'll be okay."

"But what about when he comes back, Leo? He's gonna come back and he's gonna wanna kill us even more!"

Leo's face stiffened. "We'll get there when we get there, little brother. But as long as we have each other, we'll come out on top."

Mikey shook his head wildly from side to side. "L-L-Leo…I was s-so s-scared. When he said one of our b-brothers was d-down—"

"—I know," said Leo. His grip tightened. "I was, too."

"B-but you were so—"

"Just because I didn't show it, doesn't mean I wasn't scared, Michelangelo. I can't lose you—any of you, but I had to prioritize. First I had to get us out of there. I couldn't plan a rescue until we were safe."

"I couldn't do that." Mikey said, shaking.

"That's why I'm the leader, little brother."

Mikey's sobs turned to sniffles. Leo rubbed his shell comfortingly.

"How could you be so sure, big brother?"

"What?" Leo asked, not completely understanding.

"How did you know they'd be okay? That we'd all—you know…"

His dark blue eyes stared down into his little brother's lighter ones. "I know my brothers, Michelangelo. I know what they're capable of, and the one thing I know, more than anything, is that my little brothers are strong enough to beat anything. I believe in Don, Raph and Mikey."

Leo pulled back, his eyes glazed over.

Mikey watched, in awe. Unshed tears blurred his vision. "I believe in Leonardo."

It was though the sound of Mikey's voice pulled Leo back from the land of thought. His lips curled into a smile.

"Thanks, Mikey," he whispered.

They shared a brief silence. Leo carefully watched Mikey's face. He could tell that wasn't all of what bothered the other turtle. He leaned back on his bed and glanced up at the ceiling, allowing his mind to wander again. If Raph's injuries had been any worse, he may never have made it back to the lair at all, and if they'd been any later rescuing Don, the genius might have been…

Leo didn't even want to think about it.

"How can they call us monsters?" Mikey's voice cracked.

Leo glanced up at Mikey, who was still sitting on the edge of his bed. He sighed.

"All they see is our bodies, little brother. They don't realize that we're living, breathing, thinking creatures."

Mikey sucked in a breath and shook his head. "No, Leo, you're wrong."

The blue-masked turtle propped himself up on his elbows, to get a clearer view of Mikey's expression.

"They just don't care." Mikey whispered.

The silence proved the younger brother right. Leo looked away.

"They're the monsters, Leo."

"I know. I only wish we could convince them otherwise."

"It isn't worth it." Mikey spat, venomously.

Leo's eye-ridges rose in surprise.

"Anyone who'd just kill something because it's different doesn't deserve to live."

"That's not our call to make, little brother." Leo said, softly.

"It should be somebody's!" Mikey argued, tears of pain and anger pinching at the corners of his eyes.

"Then how would we be any better than they are?" he asked.

Mikey's shoulders fell and the tears ran down his face.

The sight of his little brothers crying always made Leo feel like he'd failed them. A tear of his own escaped him. "I'm so sorry, Michelangelo. I know it hurts."

"I wish you could make it go away."

More tears gathered in Leo's eyes and he choked out, "Me too, little brother, me too."

The forest-green turtle sat up and tugged Mikey closer. Mikey lay his head on Leo's shoulder.

"You know what Master Splinter said, before? About the foi—the foyoy—the faoyaoy—the foylies?"

Leo snorted and flicked Michelangelo between the eyes. "Foibles."

"Yeah, those."

"What about them?"

"You really think—if there hadn't been danger—Raph might not 've forgiven Donnie?"

Leo frowned. Not long before he'd fallen asleep, he'd wondered the same thing. He shook his head.

"I don't know for certain, Mikey, but I think Raph would have come back. Don might have had to get down on his knees and beg, but I think Raph would've forgiven him…eventually."

"What about what Splinter said?"

"Splinter said a lot of things today, Mikey."

The youngest pulled his head in a little closer to his shell.

"He said nothing lasts forever…not even family." Mikey's face was filled with pain. "Leo, we'll never stop being brothers, right?"

"Never." Leo said with certainty. Determination flooded his ocean-blue gaze. "Never in a million years. We'll always be brothers, no matter what happens. I promise, Michelangelo, I'll always be there for you."

Mikey pressed into his brother's side. "Thanks."

Leo smiled. "That's what brothers are for."

Mikey hummed. "Big brothers are awesome."

"Bet your shell, we are."

They both looked up. One of Leo's eye-ridges rose inquisitively at the sight of his red-masked sibling.

"Why are you still up?"

"Kinda hard to sleep when you two are in here sobbing your guts out." Raph said, having a seat on the bed, leaning into Leo's other side.

Leo rolled his eyes.

"'Sides, the brainiac just released me from the lab."

"The lab?" Leo echoed, concerned.

Mikey rested his heavy head on his big brother's shoulder. His eyelids were getting very heavy…

"Thankfully, it's just a mild concussion," Don's voice supplied.

Leo turned his head to see the genius brother standing in the doorway. He spoke to him over Raph's head.

"You're sure?"

Don nodded. Leo's shoulders relaxed. His attention turned back to his other two little brothers and realized both were now leaning heavily against him, emitting soft, even snores. He looked back at Donnie.

"I appear to be trapped."

Don smiled when he saw what Leo meant. "Looks like it. Is that a bad thing?" He asked.

Leo laughed and shook his head. "Not at all, but I'm not so sure how much sleep I'll be able to get like this."

Don walked soundlessly over to the bed and sat down, also leaning into his big brother. "In that case—I'll make it even harder for you."

"Gee, thanks." Leo said, rolling his eyes, but inside, his heart had never been more glad. He was just starting to settle into a light sleep when he sensed something off. He reached down to Donnie's forearm and found the source. Don's hands were shaking.

"Donnie? You okay."

"Y-yeah, Leo. I guess I'm still a little shaken."

"And also shaking. Is there anything I can do?" Leo asked, genuine desire to help his brother expressed in his tone of voice.

Donnie shook his head from side to side, and the shaking of his hands intensified. He hiccupped. "I—hic—I j-just didn't know what to d-do, Leo. Raph left and it was all my fault and when I was talking to him, he wasn't going to come back. He said he wanted nothing to do with us—with me. It was all my fault."

"Donnie it wasn't just you, we all—"

"No, Leo. This time it was me. He was so adamant about never coming back, but then—when the missile hit the party wagon—he was so worried about us. He was scared, Leo. I could hear it. He was terrified. Even after all the things I said, even when after he'd quit, he still cared."

"Of course he did, Don, because Raph just quit the team. He never quit being your big brother."

"Seeing him go down like that—it scared me, Leo."

Leo squeezed Don's forearm. He wanted to turn so he could hug the brainiac, but his two snoring brothers rather limited his sphere of movement. Donnie understood.

"When Vizioso said one of my brothers was down, I was scared, too."

"I'm sorry, Leo. If I hadn't said that stuff to Raph in the first place, we never would've—"

"You don't know that Don. Let it go. Raph's forgiven you. Now you gotta forgive yourself."

"How can I, Leo? We almost lost Raph!"

"We almost lost you, too," Leo reminded him.

"So?! Leo our family almost fell apart because of something I said!"

"Donnie, we're brothers and we're a team, we cover each other's mistakes. Yeah, you two had a few issues, but you sorted them out. Everything's okay. You learned your lesson."

Donnie looked away. His hands had stopped shaking, but his lip still jutted out into a frown. "Yeah, but how do we forgive each other, knowing that we might have been seriously hurt because of the things we said?" He whispered, looking at Raph's sleeping face.

Leo sighed. "It isn't easy. But I'm sure our resident hothead would be glad to help straighten things out for you."

"With the regular dose of noogies and headlocks included, I assume."

Leo smiled. "Of course." He was happy to see a smile back on Donnie's face.

With a contented sigh, Donatello finally relaxed. "I'm sure glad I have such awesome brothers," he said.

Leonardo smiled and made himself as comfortable as he could, the heavy pull towards sleep returning. He yawned, and his face settled into a dreamy grin. "We're so glad to have you."

Just as he closed his eyes, before drifting off to sleep, he added, to himself: I love you, little bros.

* * *

 **Review Please! How was it?**


	4. A Form of Release

**Can be seen as a follow-up piece to Never Alone of Brotherly Bonds, but if you haven't read those, this is also quite capable of standing on its own. So you don't have to have read that one to get this one.**

 **But if you haven't read that one, I should tell you, this takes place Season 3 of the 2012 series when they are at the farmhouse. Post Race with the Demon, at which point, Donnie and Casey have become real close friends and have started fixing up the Party Wagon, virtually excluding Raphael from the entire process. Leo and Raph have formed a close bond. This happens kinda after the turtles return from their Vision-Quest, before they head back to New York, so Leo is no longer limping.**

 **I think that's probably a little more than you need to know, but just as explanation for people who haven't been following the show, or who needed a quick recap.**

* * *

 **Ch. 4-A Form of Release**

Donatello had been out in the barn working with Casey Jones all day. It was five o'clock when Leo finally came out to check on them. Those two were at it again, bickering away as they poked around deep in the engine of the party wagon.

"Hey, you two," Leo said, sitting down with a grunt.

Don turned to his brother, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. Leo smiled when Don's hand streaked grease across his head.

"Hey, Leo, what's up?"

"You've been out here all day, Don. Don't you think you should come in and spend some time with the rest of us?"

"Sorry, Leo, but we really can't, we've got to get this done."

"If you'd let Raph help, I'm sure the three of you could get it done tomorrow." Leo suggested.

Don sighed. "Leo, Casey and I have got everything under control."

Casey cursed as he cut his thumb. The two turtles turned to him.

"First-aid kit?"

"In the back."

Casey nodded, holding his injured finger tightly and rushing to the other end of the vehicle.

In a hushed tone, Leo said, "Donnie, did it ever occur to you that maybe Raphael wants to help?"

"Leo…" Don sighed.

"After everything that's happened, Don, we need to support each other."

The brainiac nodded. "I know, and we do."

"Really?"

"Yes, really." Don blinked, not quite sure what Leo meant, but he didn't like what was being implied.

Leo stared past Donatello at the human bandaging his injured finger several feet away. "Then you could stand to make some improvement." He stood and left without another word, leaving his younger sibling staring after him.

* * *

Leo paused at the door of the room he shared with Raphael. The red-masked turtle had been in there all day, and Leo hadn't been able to convince him to come out.

He sighed and didn't bother knocking. Knowing Raph, he'd probably hear Leo's step lingering outside the door.

It surprised the eldest when Raph didn't acknowledge him with the usual grunt. Raph was sprawled out on the floor, with a pencil in his hand and a sketchbook laid out in front of him.

Leo blinked a few times and canted his head. I didn't know Raph drew, he thought. He stepped around the hothead to get a better look at the drawing Raph was working on. He gasped and took a few rapid steps back in alarm. Raph's pencil hit the floor and the hothead turned to his older brother in surprise.

One of Leo's hands rested on his katanas as his eyes remained fixed on the sketch. If he didn't know better, he'd think it was about to pop off the page and come after him. His arms trembled a little.

Raph stared at his older brother anxiously. "Leo, what—" he looked down at the open sketchbook and made the connection. He sat in front of the book, blocking Leo's view.

Leo snapped out of it and stared at his immediate younger brother for a moment. His hand came away from his katanas and his posture loosened.

After a minute or two, Raph said, "Sorry."

Leo looked at Raph's face.

"I didn't know you were there."

There was still no visible reaction from the elder sibling.

Raph sighed. "I'll put it away."

"No."

Raph was surprised. He waited for Leo to give him a reason why he shouldn't.

"Can I see it again?"

"Are you sure you want to?" Raph asked, cautiously, trying to size up his older sibling's current mood.

"I'm prepared now."

"Whatever you say, chief." Raph handed the book off to his older sibling.

Leo took it with a grateful nod. A deep frown spread over his face. The image was an extremely disturbing one.

Raph, who was watching carefully, noticed Leo's unease.

"Maybe this isn't the time." He said. He reached out to grab it, but Leo turned away from him. Raph got the message: Leo wasn't giving up until he was done.

"How do you get so much detail? It's not like you had him sit and pose for you. At least, I sincerely hope you didn't." Leo joked weakly.

Raph grinned, replied sarcastically, "Of course, Leo. I just told him 'sit here while I do your portrait' and then when I was done he just let me go cause I did such a nice job. Or, even better, he corners me and says 'I will kill you, turtle! But first I want to commission a portrait from you to hang on the wall of my lair.'"

Leo really laughed at that. After his laughter had died down, he marveled once again at the intricacy of his brother's work.

"You think it's that good, huh?" Raph asked, raising an eye-ridge at the look of complete enthrallment on Leo's face.

"Good? Raph, that's a severe understatement." Leo shivered at the coldness of the eyes. They struck almost as much fear into his heart as the real thing.

"Took all day, but I think I finally got it right this time."

"Why do you think I practically jumped across the room?" Leo remarked, marveling at depth Raph had achieved with the shading.

"If it bothers ya, Leo—"

"No, I think I've gotten over it. But I half expect it to come jumping after me."

"C'mon, Leo, it's not that good."

Leo shook his head from side to side. "Raph, are you kidding?!"

Raphael shrugged it off.

"You could give Mikey a run for his money."

A weird look crossed Raphael's face. Leo raised an eye-ridge.

"What?" Leo asked.

Raph looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, Mikey painted that mural on the wall of his room, remember?"

Raphael actually laughed.

Leo's eye-ridges furrowed in confusion. "What's so funny?" He asked.

"The mural on Mikey's wall?"

"Yeah?"

"I painted it." Raph said with a smile.

It took Leo a few seconds to comprehend the sentence. "You did?" He stammered, a bit shocked. Mikey had paraded around telling everyone that he painted it.

"Yeah. The little knucklehead found my sketchbook. He held me over a barrel. Told me that if I didn't help paint a mural on his wall, he'd go parading around the lair with my book under his arm, showing them to everyone."

Leo blinked. "Help him?"

"Yeah, he designed it. I painted it specifically for him, just the way he wanted."

Leo didn't understand. Why was Raphael so eager to hide his talent? "It's a gift Raph, you should be proud of it."

Raph scoffed. "Are you kidding? Casey would probably laugh his head off. And I know how Don feels about artistic endeavors." He said sullenly.

Leo canted his head. "What do you mean?"

The hothead looked at the floor. "It's nothing."

"You can tell me." Leo urged. He gave his younger sibling a gentle pat on the shoulder.

"It was a long time ago, no point talking about it now."

Leonardo gently sidled up against Raphael's shoulder and nudged him gently. Keeping his gaze glued to the floor, Raph leaned gratefully into Leo's support.

"When we were nine I used to draw all the time. With Mikey or you or whoever was willing to do it with me. I'd use pens, pencils, crayons, charcoal, whatever was on hand." Raphael paused and looked away.

Leo leaned comfortably against Raph and rested his head on Raph's shoulder. Raph tossed him off with a little grunt, but when Leo settled back in the same position, he conceded with a drawn-out sigh of annoyance.

"One day I asked Donnie to draw with me. He said that drawing was just a waste of time. He told me to grow up and do something useful."

Leo's arms wrapped around Raph's shoulders, "We all know that Donnie can get snappy when he's in the middle of something, Raph. Just because he said that, doesn't mean that—"

"I know."

Leo looked back down at Raph's sketchbook. He turned the page. What greeted him was an abstract image. A dark, swirling vortex. He turned another page: a stormy sky with lightning flashing. He leafed on through a few more pages. Most of the images were dark, filled with swirls of black, purple and dark blue. His fingers slowed as he saw a corner of the image on the next page. It was another portrait of Shredder, penned in black and dark red ink. Looking at it was hard, because it reminded him only too keenly of his injuries and the battle that had preceded them. He quickly moved on.

He canted his head. A green figure with its arms outstretched was suspended mid-air against a night sky. Raph leaned over Leo's shoulder and looked at it.

"I call it The Fall."

"What is he falling from?"

"Wrong question. You should be asking where he's falling to." Raph said softly. He nodded forward. "Turn the page."

Leo did as Raphael instructed. The next image only made him blink more rapidly. This time the green figure was sprawled out in the midst of a swirling darkness.

"I'm not really sure."

Raph shrugged. "Neither am I. Originally, it was supposed to be the ground. Instead it ended up being more like a black hole."

"I'm glad it isn't the ground. This way there's life in it. Interest. One wonders just where he's going."

"Don't look too deep into it. 'S just a drawing."

"But you put something into it, a part of you."

"Why do you think they're so dark?" Raph asked, not expecting an answer.

Leonardo didn't even try to give one. He recognized a rhetorical question when he heard it. His eyes briefly scraped the surface of his brother's face. Raph obviously didn't want to be easily read.

"Does it help you channel your anger?" Leo asked, nodding at Raph's sketchbook.

Raph sighed and looked away. "I don't draw when I'm angry. That's just a waste of paper."

"But it is an emotional release?"

"Guess you could call it that. I got a lot of things inside that just gotta get out, ya know?" Raph said. "Everybody's gotta have some type of release."

"I understand, little brother. We all have our methods. You release your emotions through art, I train, Donnie and Casey—" Leo was suddenly sorry he'd even said those last two names. The slightest mention of Donnie and Casey had put Raph back into a dark mood. "Uh…Raph?" Leo asked when his brother didn't respond for a few moments.

Raphael's facial expression had changed from saddened to something more thoughtful. His eyes drifted away from his brother's face.

Leo took a small step forward, but Raph had completely turned away.

"I think I understand."

Leo canted his head.

"You're right, Leo. Everyone copes in different ways. Casey and Don, they fix cars. Something they know a lot about. They don't wanna deal with all the crap you and I have weighing us down right now. So they've pulled away. Made a nice little world where they think they can hide from everything and everyone, even their family."

Big, blue eyes blinked blankly. Leo's eye-ridges rose. "You know, little brother. I think you just might be right." He said, bringing his hand to his chin.

Raph's contemplative look broke and he stared flatly at his big brother. "Really?"

"What?"

"You even pose like Captain Ryan. Seriously, Leo?"

"What?! I'm not posing, it's a comfortable thinking position!" Leo said defensively.

Raph rolled his eyes. "You're such a dork, Leo."

"Space Heroes is a great show! If you gave it half a chance, you'd really like it. Seriously, if you'd just sit down and watch all the way through an episode with me-"

"That's what you said last time, Fearless. Well, I watched an episode, and I ain't impressed."

Leo glared and crossed his arms. "You were blasting music from your boombox the entire time. You couldn't even hear a word of what they were saying."

"I don't have to. 'Brazenly go wherever we want', something goes wrong, the whole crew freaks out, we're all gonna die—SLAP—Captain Ryan saves the day, we all fly away in our happy space ship. Not much to it, Leo."

The eldest turtle huffed. "I don't know why I even try to have this argument with you."

"Me neither, considering you always lose."

Lips pulled in a straight line, Leo ground his teeth. He turned away from Raphael with a grumbled of, "Can't even listen to reason." He started to leave when he got pulled back. Sensing a change in the atmosphere, he faced Raphael. His younger brother's face was soft and earnest.

"Leo…I wanted to, uh, well, to say—you know—for all your support lately." Raph bowed his shoulders and tucked his neck a little further into his shell, making him seem even smaller than he already was.

Leo punched Raph's scarred plastron affectionately. "Don't worry about it, little brother."

Raphael rubbed the back of his neck and bounced from foot to foot nervously. "I, um, I kinda sorta made you something to say, well—you know—so…" Raph pulled out a poster-sized sketchbook.

One of Leo's eye-ridges shot up. Where the heck had Raph gotten that from?

As though reading his brother's mind, Raphael said, "April said that whoever had this farmhouse before was a kinda part-time artist. There's a whole bank of stuff like this in the attic. She said I could take some."

Curious, Leo drifted over to Raph's side as the hothead lay the book out on the floor. Raph started to flip quickly through the few used pages, but Leo made him slow down. They were mostly landscapes, but they were just as fine as the rest of Raph's work. Raph tried to skip a page. Leo nudged him.

"Let me see that one."

"It's—it's not finished yet."

"Raph, please?" Leo asked sweetly.

Raph yielded. Turning the page, Leo's excitement flew out the window. The detail work on this one was exquisite. Looking down through a window upon a dirt path leading to a small, broken-down garage. Coming through the garage shack's open doors, were a greasy, but happy-looking pair of friends. Donatello and Casey Jones, smiling like they'd just been told the punch-line of a great joke.

Rising to his feet, Leonardo drifted over to the window and looked down. It was the same viewpoint. At this very moment, he could see through the open door and catch the faces of his brother and their human friend in the dim light. He turned to look back at Raph, to say something…anything, but his brother had already moved on. The page had been turned.

Leo started to return to Raphael's side. His eyes bugged out of his head. With a smile a mile wide, he tackled his younger sibling to the floor in a hug, before jumping up and excitedly running around the poster-sized sketchbook, squealing and giggling like a little girl.

"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Ohmygosh! OhmygoshOhmygoshOhmygosh!"

Raphael sat up and smiled at the sight of his big brother, reduced to such a childish state of glee by something like this. Next thing he knew, he was flying up off the ground. Leo had lifted him up. Like literally into the air. He squirmed uncomfortably and Leo plopped him back down.

"Thank you! ThankyouThankyouThankyouThankyouThankyou!"

"You're welcome to the sixth power." Raph grumbled, grunting as Leo smothered him in a hug.

Leo jumped up and kissed him loudly on the top of his head.

Raphael gagged and shoved Leo away. "Get the fuck away from me!" He exploded, rubbing furiously at his scalp. "You ever try that shit again and I'll skin ya, Fearless!" He threatened.

Leo's bouncing excitement barely even dulled at his brothers' outburst. He yanked Raph into another hug. "You are the coolest brother in all existence!" He said.

"It's not that big a deal." Raph grumbled, still rubbing his head.

"Not a big deal?! Look at it! Look at it!" Leo exclaimed, dragging Raph over to the drawing.

"I don't gotta look at, I drew it, Fearless."

"It's awesome." Leo said, sounding star-struck.

Raph grinned. "Not exactly my cup of tea, but I did my best." He almost yelped as he found himself trapped in another hug.

"You're the best, Raphie."

"Shutup, Leo."

"You really are, though. You're awesome, bro."

"Thanks big brother." Raph whispered, finally returning the embrace.

Leo yanked away after barely a millisecond had passed. "Help me put it on the wall."

Raphael laughed.

Together the two turtles taped the poster-sized drawing to the wall.

In Space Heroes font along the top were the words "Congratulations Cadet". A larger-than-life Captain Ryan stood to the left in all his glory, holding in his hand the insignia presented to all members of the Planetary Alliance. The key members of his crew were scattered throughout the background. Directly across from the Captain, stood Leonardo, saluting as he received his 'badge' from the hero he loved the most.

* * *

Casey and Don didn't make it to dinner, so by the time they finally did go in to eat, both of them were starving. They found a note on the fridge. Don pulled it off and read it. His mind completely boggled by the language of Mikey, he had to read it again, and finally a third time.

 _Hey dudes! What's up? It's like way nighttime and you guys are still hacking away in the garage. Leo said not to tell you dinner was ready. Said you'd come eat whenever ya wanted to. So yeah, there's stuff in the fridge. I'm goin' out to the woods with Leo and Raph. April's gone to bed so don't get super loud. Big blue says we might camp out, so don't freak out or anything if we don't come back tonight. Apparently Raph's found some great place for skipping stones and we're just gonna hang out and stuff. They're even letting me bring the marsh-mellows. Sorry you missed out, dudes._

 _-Mikey_

Don's first thought upon reading Mikey's note was: I really need to teach Mikey how to spell marshmallows.

The second was: My brothers just went camping without me?

And the third was: My brothers just went camping without me.

He handed the note to Casey, who seemed to have a similar reaction, but he was more…angry.

"What the shell? They just went camping without us?! Not cool, man. Not cool!"

Don opened the fridge and pulled out some cold leftovers. "Yeah, but I guess—we have been telling them we were busy."

"Still, they should have asked us first."

"—Casey, do you think I've been…neglecting my brothers?"

"What?" Casey asked, confused.

"It's just that, when Leo came in earlier this afternoon, he said that we needed to support each other."

"Yeah. So?"

"Well, I—don't know. I guess…I guess I just feel like I've let them all down. They need me and I've been spending all of my time with you." he quickly added, "No offense."

Casey held up a hand and shook his head. "I get it, dude, no sweat."

"Do you think we've been ignoring Raph too much?"

"Raph?" Casey parroted, taking the tupperware of leftovers from Donnie's hands, grabbing a fork from the drawer and proceeding to chow down.

Don crossed his arms. "Yeah, Raph, my brother, your best friend?"

Casey looked up. "Huh? Dude, you guys are all my friends."

"C'mon Casey, we all know you and Raph are more alike than two knives in a silver set."

Casey laughed and shook his head, speaking through his food. "Nah, not really. Sure we're similar, but we're kinda too alike, ya know? I'm honestly feeling kinda closer to you right now. 'Sides, Raph and I don't really see eye to eye anymore. He changed after the whole Leo thing, got all serious and stuff. Guess it's just cause I wanted to push it all out. Ya know, the whole outta sight outta mind thing, but Raph just kept bringing it back, and I couldn't take that. Just wanted to forget about all that serious shit, just for a minute, ya know?"

Donatello blinked. Pieces slid into place that he'd assumed weren't even parts of the puzzle. He, Donatello, had unintentionally stolen his brother's best friend. And it made him feel like the biggest shell-brain on the face of the planet. Raph was so worried about Leo he could think about nothing else. Casey and Raph drifted apart. And it was then that Donnie and Casey had found an odd bit of common ground and now…

He'd stolen Raph's best friend. And he felt awful. No wonder Leo was pushing him to let Raph help with the Party Wagon, or just…anything at all. Raph was probably lonely. He probably needed someone to blow off steam with. Knowing Raph, he'd bottled up all of his rage and devastation at Splinter's loss and buried it deep down in his heart. Not to mention the aftermath of Leo's injury.

Shell, what had he done?

Casey and Raph would become best buds again, of that Donatello had no doubts, they were just too alike not to, but how was he ever gonna make up for all the ignorance and pain that he'd put Raph through? The new and improved party wagon was pretty much complete. All it needed was a new paintjob and—

A new paintjob. That was it. Raph could help them paint the Party Wagon, but would Raph even want to help them?

"Casey, what if we have Raph paint the Party Wagon?"

Casey sat up straight and stared at Donnie like he'd grown another head. "Raph?"

"Yes, Raph. He could do it."

"Seriously? Raph?"

Don glared. "Raph's always been a great artist."

"C'mon, Don, I had some seriously wicked ideas for some pin-striping that would have been totally metal, dude." Casey whined.

Donatello growled. "I want Raphael to do it. Please, Case. I don't want him to think I don't appreciate him."

Casey Jones huffed and sighed. "Fine. Let Raph do it."

Don smiled, happily, looking forward to being able to tell his brother in the morning.

* * *

As it happened, Donatello's brothers didn't return home until almost noon the following day. Donnie and Casey were in the kitchen when Leo, Mikey and Raph came in from the back porch, talking animatedly about their trip.

Casey sent Don an understanding look and announced loudly, "I'm gonna go see what Red is up to." He left the way the other three turtles had come, the old screen door slamming loudly behind him. The other turtles didn't even seem to notice his departure.

Mikey was flaunting his title of stone-skipping champion in his big brothers' faces and they were smiling at him. Raph growled and pounced upon the unsuspecting young turtle, catching him in a headlock. Mikey yelped.

"Hey, no fair, Raph!"

"Just cause ya can throw rocks better than me and Leo don't mean you've got the edge little brother. Now whatta ya say?"

Mikey rolled his eyes. "Raphael is all wise and powerful—"

"Alright Mikey, that's enough for today." Raph said, letting Mikey go.

The youngest locked onto Donatello and honed in like a homing beacon.

"Donnie, Donnie, Donnie, Donnie, Donnie!" He exclaimed, excitedly. "I beat Raph and Leo at skipping stones! I won! I won!"

Don smiled. "Are you sure they weren't going easy on you?"

Leo and Raph smirked at each other.

Suddenly, Mikey's face wrinkled up and he turned to his big brothers, "You wouldn't…you didn't, right? I won cause I'm awesome, right?"

Leo and Raph smiled and shook their heads. "Naw, Mikey. Much as Leo and I hate to admit it, you kicked shell."

Happiness restored, Mikey broke out into a victory dance. Raphael sighed and covered his eyes.

"Sometimes I can't believe I'm related to you guys."

Leo and Mikey looked at each other and slid over, tossing their arms around Raph's shoulders and trapping him in a two-sided hug.

"But you'll always love us, Raphie." Leo said.

"Yeah, what's not to love?" Mikey joked.

Raphael snorted. A chill traveled down the back of his shell when a cold, three-fingered hand rested upon his shoulder. He craned his neck to look at Don standing a little bit behind him.

"Raph…"

An awkward silence settled over them. Don smiled, wanly, trying his best not to let the silence get to him. "Raph—" he began again, clearing his throat, "I, well, um…" Donnie smiled at his brothers and wrapped his arms around them as best he could. His eyes began to water and his lip trembled. Like they could feel Donatello's distress, his brothers' love surrounded him on all sides, and when he opened his eyes again, he discovered that he was now in the center of a three-way hug.

"I love you guys." He whispered.

Mikey's arms pulled away from Leo and Raph and he stepped forward to hug Donnie tightly. The two older brothers pulled back a little.

"We love you too, D."

Don sniffled and wiped away the tears from his eyes. "I'm sorry. I've been ignoring you guys and I—" The second his eyes met Raph's his mouth went dry.

Leo looked from Don to Raph and gathered the threads of the situation. He turned to Mikey and grabbed the youngest by the arm. He looked at Don and said, "We'll be right outside if you need us, but we'll let you work this out yourselves."

Don nodded. His hands were quaking. He had no idea how Raph was going to react. Right now the hothead looked halfway between hugging him and hitting him. Raph's footstep echoed, stopping not a full foot from his younger siblings'. An emerald-green hand rose and Don braced himself for impact. It landed softly on his shoulder. Donnie blinked and managed a tiny smile.

Then, Raph's other hand came up and slapped him across the face. He swore loudly. Raph's green eyes flashed.

"You deserved that."

"Doesn't mean I can't hope it isn't super painful," Don grumbled.

Raphael turned his carapace on his brother.

"Raph—" Donnie called.

Raph turned half-way back around.

"What I told the others…that goes for you, too."

"Uh-huh."

"I mean it." Don glared.

"I know you do," said Raph.

"You don't act like it."

"Apologizing doesn't magically make things better, Don."

"I want to commission you."

Raphael's snout wrinkled. One of his eye-ridges shot up to the top of his head. "Excuse me?"

"The Party Wagon needs painting. Think you can you handle it?"

Raph's lips curled back. "I'm not an artist Don. I don't take commissions. You told me to give it up when we were nine, remember?"

"Maybe it just took me eight years to get the courage to admit I was wrong."

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?" Raph asked, growling.

"Since when have you ever listened to anything I tell you to do, Raph?!" Don shouted, getting angry at his stubborn brother for being so damn unreasonable. "Quit acting like a baby! Stop whining and crying and get up off your shell and do something!"

"Alright, ya know what? I've had it! That's it! I'm tired of being yur and Casey's whipping post! I'm not doing you anymore favors and I'm not gonna paint the Party Wagon!"

"Oh yes, you are! I had to fight Casey to get you this job, you're not backing out of it, Raphael!"

"You can tell Casey Jones, he can do whatever the fuck he wants, cause I'm not touching it!"

Leo and Mikey burst back in, concern and annoyance etched on both of their faces.

"What the shell is going on in here?!" Leo asked, storming in to take the position of a protective wall between Don and Raph, who were too close and too aggressive to be safely left alone.

Don and Raph went right on arguing.

"You're right, Raph. I just don't understand you. I'm trying to patch things up! I'm trying to do something good for you, here! I fought to get you this opportunity and now you're pushing me away! I don't understand and I don't think I'll ever understand! You're temper is tearing us apart and just completely—utterly irritating! You've always been bad, Raph, but this is just—you're out of control!"

Raphael laughed bitterly. Leo shot him a worried glance.

"Yeah?" Raph asked, his voice more acidic than vinegar. Raph's shoulders drooped. "Maybe losing my best friend has something to do with it."

Like a windswept dandelion, Donatello's fight fluttered away. Guilt pooled in his stomach. "Raph, I didn't mean to—"

"My fault, Don. Just let it go." Raph turned his back on them all and stormed out the kitchen door muttering, "I'll be in my room."

Mikey's bottom lip pushed out. He reached into the drawer and took out a stained piece of paper. Leo, attention diverted to the youngest, asked, "What's that, Mikey?"

"Recipe for strawberry bread." Mikey murmured.

Leo smiled and hugged his little brother. "That's Raph's favorite."

Mikey nodded.

"I'm sure he'll love that, little brother." Leo said soothingly, nudging Michelangelo into action. When the youngest was gone, Leonardo looked at Don and frowned. "Donatello."

"Yeah, Leo?"

"Go talk to him." Leo ordered.

Don sighed. "He's mad at me. Don't you think you should—"

"I think you'd be surprised how fast Raph's anger burns out, Don. Please, go talk to him. I can't run a team where two of my team members refuse to speak to each other."

"Alright." Don said shakily, starting to leave the room, hoping that this conversation wouldn't end as loudly as the one just a few seconds earlier.

"Raph's still hurting, Don. Be careful."

"I will." Don nodded, determinately.

Don paused outside the door to Leo and Raph's room. He knocked softly before he entered. Raphael was sprawled out on the floor. A sketchbook lay out in front of him on the ground and he seemed to be shading something. Don took a step forward, and then a few more. Raph still didn't acknowledge him. Getting a peek of Raphael's current work, Donnie stilled. In the image, a lone sai lay on the ground atop a bed of what appeared to be hand-wrappings splotched with blood. The image made Donnie shudder. Biting his lip, he stepped closer and closer, until he was certain his feet were in Raph's line of sight. Raphael looked up at him, but instead of the anger Don expected, Raph seemed emotionally subdued.

Don knelt down next to his brother. He looked at the sketch in progress. "Looks good…really good."

Raph looked away.

"I mean it."

"I know ya do. I'm just not used to people seeing my stuff, ya know?"

Donnie frowned a little. He reached out and put a hand on Raph's shoulder, once again, trying to ignore the way his brother flinched at the touch. "Raph...I—If you don't feel comfortable repainting the Party Wagon, you don't have to. I'll—"

"You said you had to fight?"

"Huh?"

"For the party wagon. For me to repaint it?"

"Oh, yeah. Casey wanted to do it. Insisted upon the two of us doing it ourselves. But I'm not very artsy, Raph. Blueprints are pretty different from graphic design."

"It ain't that big a stretch, Don."

"Still, I knew you would be a better choice. And I thought you'd like it. I thought maybe it could help make up for the way Casey and I've kinda been blowing you off. Look, I'll just tell Casey that he can—"

"No. Don, I—I'll do it."

"You sure?"

Raph grinned. "Sure. You two dorks think knowing your way around an engine block is impressive. When I'm done with her, that old hippie van is gonna be coolest thing on wheels."

Don smiled, feeling at ease. "Thanks, Raph." He slid over and hugged Raph. The hothead shrugged him off and started looking around.

"Where did I leave that giant sketchbook?" the hothead asked himself. He saw it tucked between the wall and his bed. "There it is."

Donnie also looked around and found a new poster adorning the wall of his big brothers' room. He blinked once, twice and thrice. How the shell had Leo gotten—

He turned and saw Raph pulling a poster-sized sketchbook out from behind the bed. A smile stretched across his face.

"Wow, Raph. I didn't realize you were such a big Space Heroes fan." Don remarked, trotting over to examine it more closely.

Raph growled. "You know I'm not. Did it for Leo."

"Obviously."

When Don turned back around, he did a double-take. Raphael was once again sprawled on the floor, the poster-size sketchbook open and his hand dancing across the page. He'd divided it neatly into four sections. Don drew closer and watched as Raph sketched out the Party Wagon from four different angles: front, back, and both sides. Once the base was done, Raph began penciling in details. He paused and looked up at Donnie.

"So, what do you want?"

"What?"

"Yeah. What, Brainiac?"

"I don't understand."

"What do you want on it?" Raph clarified, annoyed by Don's inability to comprehend his meaning.

"Well…I thought I'd leave that up to you." Don said, softly.

Raph stared for a few minutes. "Full creative freedom? You really think that's a good idea?"

"What's the matter, Raph, can't handle it?" Don teased. He frowned when Raph's eyes actually dimmed a little.

"I—"

"I know you can, bro. You're awesome. Just do whatever feels right."

Raphael nodded, chewing his lip in thought. Don watched in fascination as his most closed-off brother's face became a summersault of emotions. Raph's pencil darted across the paper faster than Donnie had ever seen before, pouring out ideas and emotions in a medium the smart turtle had very little experience with, but he didn't need experience to see at once: his big brother was a natural. Piece by piece, line by line, layer upon layer of detail was brought to the forefront. Raph tore the page from sketchbook and started another one, drawing the Party Wagon from above and at different angles to cover nearly every inch.

While Raph worked on that, Don looked at what his red-masked brother had so far. "So the roof is made of pentagonal and hexagonal shapes. Like our carapaces?"

"Yep." Raph responded.

"The body is yellow."

"Mm-hm."

"What's this here? On the right side. You have this space sectioned off with the letters R.F.E. What's that stand for?"

"Reserve for Experimentation."

"What's that mean?" Don asked.

"It means I have an idea, but I'm not sure if it'll work or not."

Don smiled. "You can do this, Raph. Don't second-guess yourself."

Raph grinned and rubbed the back of his neck. "Thanks Donnie."

"Anytime, bro. Anytime."

* * *

The next day, Raph enlisted the help of his brothers, April and Casey. Though Casey grumbled a little at first, once he'd seen Raph's plans and made some recommendations of his own, some of which Raph even agreed to implement, the human teenager gladly pitched in. Then, after all of that was done, the three turtle brothers and two humans watched in astonishment as Raphael armed himself with paint cans and started to airbrush a design on the door of the Party Wagon. When he was done, they stared in awe. A green female figure, with blonde hair, wearing form-fitting brown bathing-suit-like attire and a striking red mask leaned leisurely back against a big, black, old-school bomb with a lit fuse. White, flowing text entitled her: Venus.

"That is so metal!" Casey exclaimed, throwing an arm over Raph's shoulders.

Donatello smiled. He couldn't have said it better himself.

When they all came together in a group hug, Donnie couldn't help but laugh at the horrified expression on Raphael's face when they trapped him in the middle. He had the best brothers ever.

* * *

 **This one took forever and I'm still not really sure it was ready, but I guess that writers never really feel a piece is really ready. There's always something they wish they could tweak, even when all's over and done with.**

 **Well, how was it? Review Please!**


	5. It's a Game

**Just a happy little piece to throw at you guys. Hope you like.**

* * *

 **Ch. 5-It's a Game**

"So, what's the name of this game again?"

"It's called 'Whatta ya Know'", April said, placing the box down in the center of the table. "It's fun."

"Is it some sort of trivia game?" Don asked curiously, noticing the question-mark design on the box.

April smiled, "Sort of, but it also requires some knowledge of your fellow players."

"How do you mean?" Don inquired. Raph punched him in the shoulder and cut April off.

"Just tell us how it works already."

"Ever the patient one aren't you, Raph?" Casey jeered.

Raph growled and held up a fist. "Shut up, flesh-bag, you're just as eager to get this over with as I am."

"Raph..." Leo warned.

The hothead huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back in his chair. "If you ask me this 'family game night' thing is just a whole lot of bull."

"And that's exactly why nobody's asking you." Donnie grumbled.

Before Raph could reply, an overeager turtle named Michelangelo skipped into the room and joined them at the table, eying the cards excitedly.

"Ooh! Ooh! A new game! Teach me! Teach me! Teach me!"

April rolled her eyes and smiled, explaining the rules of the game as clearly and concisely as possible. "Each round one person will pull a card from the stack. We'll each take turns going clockwise. That particular person will read the card aloud. I'll show you." She drew a card and read it out, "Color. Then you choose favorite or least favorite and say it aloud. So I'll say: 'Favorite'. Now, each of you gets one guess. Whoever is right, takes the card, and whoever has the most cards in the end wins."

Leo hummed. "What if two or more people guess the correct answer?"

"It's first come first serve."

"And if it's a tie where they guess at the same time?"

"The reader pulls and reads another card as a tiebreaker."

"And if no one guesses right?" Don asked curiously, programming the rules into his head.

"The reader keeps the cards."

Raph sighed. "This game is going to take forever. We're brothers."

"I don't know, Raph, you might find you don't know us as well as you think you do." Leo said with a grin.

"Like you dum-dums could be that discreet."

"Are you guys ready to start?" April asked, a bright smile on her face.

Mikey nodded eagerly. "Me first! Me first!" He drew a brightly colored question-mark card off the stack. His grin spread from ear to ear. "Food. Least favorite," he dragged out the word tauntingly. The table fell silent.

The more Leonardo wracked his brain the more he felt positive that there was no such thing as a least favorite food for Mikey.

April whispered softly, "If no one answers, the card will automatically go to Mikey."

Raph sighed and tapped on the table, absent-mindedly. "Turtle soup." He said, holding out his hand.

Everyone around the table stared at Mikey. The youngest looked disturbed.

"How the shell did you know that?!"

Raph shrugged nonchalantly, snatching the card out of Mikey's hand. "I dunno, you musta mentioned it in passing."

The orange-masked turtle shuddered a little. "This game's creepy. It's like he read my mind."

"I don't think Raph has the patience for that, Mikey."

The hothead shot a scalding glare at the brainiac and Donnie threw up his hands before reaching down to take a card from the deck. "Favorite Fruit."

A chorus of voices rose from around the table, raucously.

"Pomegranate!" Casey said. When Don glared at him he shrugged his shoulders, "Dunno, just seemed like a good guess."

"Cherry!" said April.

The brainiac shook his head.

Certain he was going to get it right, Leo exclaimed, "Apples!"

Don smiled. "Good guess, but no."

"Aw, that was my guess, too." Mikey bit his lip, thinking hard. He grinned and blurted out: "Strawberries."

"Nope."

"Aw, sewer apples." Mikey pouted. He had really wanted to get himself a card.

The room fell silent as Raphael once again stuck his hand out in the center of the table. "Blackberries." He didn't even bother looking up at their faces.

Don timidly handed the card over to his immediate older sibling without a word. He looked a little uncomfortable.

Raph finally looked up to find everyone staring at him with shocked faces. He flushed a little. "What?! Why the shell do ya think the fridge is chocked full of the little buggers whenever they're in season?!"

Leo blinked and thought about it. Raph did have a point. There were always a suspicious amount of blackberries in the fridge during their peak season, but…maybe the hothead just had an insanely good memory for that kind of thing.

The eldest cleared his throat and drew a card.

"Book"

The room went silent. Raphael sighed. "Favorite, or least favorite?" he asked.

Leo stared intensely at his immediate younger brother. The others stiffened and drew back a little. Finally, Leo answered.

"Least favorite."

Raph's eyes narrowed and he leant forward, theatrically rubbing his chin. For once the resident hothead seemed cool and collected. He appeared to be deep in thought.

"Do you fold?" Leo asked with a grin.

"Coraline."

Everyone looked at Leo. Then at Raph. Then back at Leo. Then back to Raph again, and finally, back to Leo. Leonardo's jaw dropped, triggering gasps of astonishment from the other family members.

Raph smirked and leaned triumphantly back in his chair. He explained to the others. "You read it when we were eleven. Had nightmares for an entire week."

"Raph!" Leo groaned, hiding his face with his hand.

Raphael smiled. "What?"

"I seem to remember someone promising not to tell our brothers?" Leo whined.

The hothead smirked. "That was six years ago!"

"It still counts." Leo's hand fell so that Raphael could see his glare.

"Come on, big brother, they need to know you're as much a living turtle as we are."

"I'm sure they already know that, Raph."

"Relax Leo. It's good to know even you get scared, once-in-a-while."

Donnie absorbed Raph's words and said softly, "He's right. It is." He smiled and patted Leo on the shoulder.

Leo sighed. "Hence my grievance with Raph's infernal nickname. You know for a fact I'm not fearless," he said.

"But you still need to be reminded of it every once in a while."

"Way to bring a turtle down, Raph."

Raph shrugged. "I can't help that I'm a realist."

"You're more of a pessimist, Raph," Don pointed out.

April drew a card. "Favorite mythical animal."

"Unicorns!" Mikey exclaimed.

"No."

"Manticore?" Don guessed.

"Dragon?" Leo submitted.

April shook her head, "No."

"Chimera?" Casey hazarded a guess.

April was not amused. "No, of course not."

All eyes slid expectantly to Raphael. He stared back at them. "What, now you think I know all the answers?"

"Based on what we've seen so far, it's a fair assumption," Don pointed out.

"Well, I don't." Raph said.

"So you secede this round?" Leo asked, looking smug.

"I didn't say that." Raph murmured. He hummed and fixed his glare on April. Finally, he answered, "Phoenix."

April looked very disturbed. "How did you—"

"Doesn't matter. Point is, he somehow knows everything," Don said and rolled his eyes. "Casey, it's your turn."

Casey stood from the table. "Unlike you guys, I can tell when I'm beaten, even if it is only the first round. I fold. I don't need Raph humiliating me in front of the rest of this table."

"Naw, you do that on your own."

Casey punched Raph in the shoulder for that crack and the hothead smiled.

"Okay, so Casey's out, guess that makes it my turn?" Raph asked.

"Finally, I can have a chance to win a card!" Mikey exclaimed in relief.

Raph smiled. "Oh you think so?" He drew a card. "Favorite—" his eye-ridges rose and he lowered the card a little.

"Something wrong?" Leo asked, growing amused when he saw the way that Raph was glaring at the card as though it had done something to offend him.

The hothead let the card fall to the table.

"Favorite hobby."

The brothers all looked at each other. Leo was the first to speak.

"Training?"

Raph scoffed. "That's you, Fearless."

"I meant strength training."

Raph paused and considered. "Can I lie?"

April glared at him. "The whole point of this game is to be genuine Raph, that way you learn things about people that you never knew before."

He sighed. "Fine," he turned to Leo. "No."

"Oh! Oh! I know! It's spending time with me!" Mikey said, hopping up and bouncing over to Raph and leaning against his shoulder. Raphael grabbed him by the face and pushed him away.

"Only thing I enjoy about that is kicking your shell, little brother." Raph grumbled, but Mikey could see the affection in his eyes.

Mikey smiled.

The cogs in Donatello's mind were still whirring. If Raph could deduce he liked blackberries from simply noticing the unusual amounts of them in the fridge, then Don knew he should be able to deduce the answer to this question, no matter how closely the hothead played his cards to his plastron. His mind rushing into overdrive, Don eyed his immediate older brother. He thought of all the years gone by and all the times he and Raph had spent hours in the garage.

"Working on engines."

"Better, but still no."

Don's bottom lip pushed out. He gnawed on it. After a few moments he slammed his hand down on the table, making everyone jump and look at him. He stared straight into Raph's eyes, which was no easy feat. Their gazes locked.

Raphael's lips curled. Challenge accepted. So, the brainiac thought he could get the hothead to crack. Unlikely.

"Watching sports."

"Nope."

"Cartoons."

"Nope."

"Collecting vintage magazines."

"Nope."

Don leaned across the table into his older brother's space. The others pulled back a little to allow the battling brothers room. Don recalled something more obscure from their childhood days.

"Poetry."

Raph's smirk dimmed a little. He hesitated, his eyes downcast. "Closer, but not quite the form you're looking for."

That was a clue. Form as in art form. Donnie took his brother's word and ran with them.

"Music…er…playing drums."

Raph shook his head.

"Drawing."

"Medium," Raph coughed.

"Painting, then?"

Raph rubbed the back of his neck and flicked the card across the table. "Took ya long enough, brainiac. Was wonderin' just how many hints ya were gonna need."

"I like drawing better." Casey said, offhandedly.

Raph grumbled. "Nobody asked you, Jones."

"Now that I know for sure you don't have this game rigged, I'll play," Casey said.

"Then you'll have to wait till we come around to your turn again." Leo stated flatly.

April smiled. Looks like this game night was going even better than planned. Raph had stayed for a full round, which didn't always happen since he wasn't the most patient turtle on the planet. And not many games could hold Donatello's interest. Leo was usually the most obliging when it came to games, but unfortunately he was a real stickler for rules, which made him difficult to play with sometimes. Michelangelo was always a ball of energy, but if the game wasn't dynamic enough, he, too, would soon lose interest.

It was refreshing to see all four turtles enjoying themselves without the threat of Shredder or a planetary invasion hanging over their heads. Casey Jones also seemed to be having a good time, though it wouldn't be long before he'd have to get going. He had to get plenty of sleep because he'd landed a part-time job at the hockey supply store down the block from his dad's apartment. Unfortunately for him, that meant taking all the early shifts on weekends.

"Favorite cartoon character."

"Chip the Woodchuck."

"Simon Squirrel."

"Happy Harry."

"No, no, and no."

"Roger Rabbit," Casey said.

Mikey smiled, "Ding, ding, ding! And the hockey player gets it."

"Hey, I'm starting to like this game," Casey said, leaning forward to take the card from Mikey's hand.

"Now that he's won, he likes it," Raph grumbled.

"Ass," Casey grumbled

"Bonehead," Raph shot back.

"Clown."

"Dimwit."

"Eejit."

"You made that up." Raph's hand clenched into a fist, subtly warning Jones to back off.

Casey Jones, of course, brilliantly ignored the gesture and fought back. "I did not!"

"Yeah, you did."

"Did not!"

"Did, too!" Raph glared.

"Did not!" Casey persisted.

"Did, too!"

April's peaceful reverie shattered, she stood up between the two hotheads. "Alright, preschoolers, it's time for recess!" She shouted.

Both boys resumed their seats and grumbled.

"Fool."

"Goon."

"Halfwit."

"Idiot."

Donatello watched them with a slight pout. "I don't know whether to insult their lack of originality or join them."

Michelangelo smiled. "You know what they say, Don. If ya can't beat 'em—"

Grinning evilly, Don opened his mouth, but Leo beat him to it.

"Jerks." Leo said evenly, crossing his arms across his plastron.

Raphael's caustic green glare turned on him.

"Kook!" Raph shouted, emphatically.

"Lame-brain." Mikey commented, grinning.

Raphael looked about ready to explode. Casey Jones smiled and leaned back in his seat to enjoy the view.

"Rgh! Motor-mouth!"

"Nimrod." Donnie submitted.

Realizing that his brothers had jumped in on his and Casey's fun, Raph's rage died down a little. He cracked both sides of his neck and smirked evilly at them. They stiffened. "You oafs think you're strong enough to make it all the way through the alphabet? Cause I can go all the way."

Leo, Donnie and Mikey looked at each other. Leo grinned. "Between the three of us? We can beat you with our eyes closed."

"We'll see about that, Pin-heads."

"Hey, that was two letters!" Donnie groused.

Raph crossed his arms. "Would you rather I call you a Poindexter, Don?"

Donatello's eyes lit up and he snarled. "Oh you're asking for it, Quimby."

Raphael's eyes narrowed.

Casey lifted the tension a little by jumping back in, "Runt."

Raph wheeled around on him, and said, "Twirp!"

The game continued as the other turtle brother each took their turns.

"Undersized, short-stuff." Leo teased.

Raphael leapt from the table and jumped on him. "Least I'm taller than Mikey, vomit-breath."

"Wuss." Donnie murmured.

April sighed and rolled her eyes. Boys. Seriously, they found amusement in the crudest things. She just sat at the table and watched as Leo tossed Raphael off.

Casey looked a little worried and called out to Raph's brothers, "Anyone got anything for X?"

"Xanthodont," Raph growled.

"You made that up."

"Did not!" Raph retorted, maturely.

"Did so!" Casey argued.

Before it could turn into another childish argument of nah-huh, yah-uh, Donatello intervened.

"Did not," the brainiac corrected. "It means: one's who's teeth are yellow."

Casey pouted and crossed his arms. "Well it's nothing no non-nerd would ever hear."

"You calling me a nerd, yob?"

Donnie raised a hand to his chin thoughtfully and looked at Casey Jones. "You know, that actually kinda fits him."

Raph smirked at the praise and refused to answer Casey's demanding questions about what it meant.

"It ain't fair when you guys all gang up on me!" Casey whined.

"Shoulda thought of that before ya let 'em join in, ya zit-face!"

"I am not! My skin is clear as—as—"

Raph smiled. "Aw, come on, Case. Ya know I'm just joking."

Casey's eyes narrowed. "You better be."

"Would I lie to you?" Raph asked, flashing a bright smile.

Casey smiled back and they fist-bumped. Then the human teenager looked at the time. "Shoot, man, I gotta go. Got the early shift at the shop tomorrow. See you guys on Monday!"

"See ya, Casey." The turtles chimed as Casey Jones hopped over the turnstiles and left.

A brief silence spread over them. They all looked at each other. Mikey smiled.

"So, who's up for a few more rounds of 'Whatta ya Know?'" he asked.

April smiled and grabbed her bag. Might as well leave now. This game was going to get too competitive for her standards. She'd rather just go and let the turtles have their fun.

The red-masked turtle smirked. "I can beat you three any day."

"Oh yeah? Prove it, meathead!" Don said.

"Oh, I will."

Leo laughed and went to follow his brothers. On his way back to the table, he realized that April was gone and that her bag was no longer hanging on the chair. He looked around and saw her heading for the lair entrance.

"Hey, April, you gonna join us for another round?"

She smiled and shook her head. "Nah, I think you guys will do just fine on your own. I gotta head home. My dad promised to help me with a science project."

"Okay. Have fun."

"You too. Try to keep Raph from killing Donnie?" She asked, teasingly.

Leo's face lit up. He looked over at where his younger siblings were sitting around the table, already pushing and shoving each other like kindergarteners. He laughed and shook his head.

"I'll do my best."

* * *

 **Review Please, how was it?**

 **I have been working on this for forever. I've just been hesitant to post it because it doesn't really go anywhere. It's really just a fun little piece.**

 **What do you guys think?**


	6. Broken

**This is very much in tandem with "Home" and "Forever and Always" of Brotherly Bonds. Can be seen as a kind of Prequel, I guess? In any case, it's earlier on that same timeline. If you haven't read those, I highly recommend it. This will be easier to understand that way, but it can stand on it's own. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Ch. 6-Broken**

"Look, you don't wanna talk about it, that's alright, we get that. We aren't gonna push ya—well, I ain't gonna push ya. Leo's probably gonna get on your case, he's certainly jumping on mine. I mean, it was my fault, so I get it. I'm the last person you want to be talking to right now."

"Go away," the purple-masked turtle ordered flatly, without sparing his sibling so much as a glance. He swiveled around in his desk chair and put his carapace to Raphael.

"Don—"

"Just go." Don spat, in eerie monotone.

Raphael's strong posture withered. "I'm sorry." He felt so small.

For some reason, however, Raphael's remorse made Donatello's beak wrinkle in disgust. "You think that's gonna cut it this time?"

Light flashed in the bright green eyes. Strong shoulders rippled with tension, and emerald-green hands became fists. "What more would ya have me do, Don? Do your chores for a month? Dance around dressed as a pumpkin singing songs for Halloween?"

Donatello still refused to look at him. "You're so stupid."

Raphael growled, stomped over to Don's chair and yanked it back around. "Wanna say that to my face, brainiac?"

"This only further proves my point," said Don, rising to his full height, towering over Raphael. "This attitude is what got me into that situation in the first place. You have a temper Raph, we've always accepted that, but somewhere we've got to draw the line. Sorry isn't going to cut it. Not anymore."

"It's all I got to give." Raph said, distressed.

Don narrowed his eyes. "Then you don't care what happens to us."

Raph grit his teeth, green eyes sparkling. "Don't care?" His voice cracked. "I don't care? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN I DON'T CARE?"

It was silent, the only sound that of Raphael's heavy breathing.

Their other family members, Master Splinter included, rushed into the room. Mikey and Leo went forward to intervene, but the old rat blocked their path with his stick. His whiskers twitched as he frowned solemnly.

Don's voice was low and airy. "They wanted to cut into my brain, Raph." The statement hung over them all like a banshee's wail. "They wanted to pry apart my skull!"

Raphael reached out. "Donnie, it's okay, we—"

"No thanks to you!" Don shouted, swatting Raphael's hand away violently. "You were the one who got us into that mess! It was all because of you! You and your temper and your pride and you intolerable stubbornness!"

Leonardo shifted his weight. His throat tightened. He glanced at Raphael and saw pain in his little brother's eyes. Raphael… He wanted to speak out, to come to Raph's defense, but Don was right. Raph's temper had gotten them into it. What they didn't know, couldn't possibly know, was that it was Leo initiated all of it.

He was the one who'd challenged Raphael to a rooftop race. It was his accidental slip up that had landed them in the middle of the fight. Raph had come to his aid. Raphael had saved him, but when Leo called the retreat, Raphael had refused to listen. He should have expected it, though, he should have been able to force the hothead to follow, but he wasn't, and he couldn't.

He had to call their little brothers for backup. He'd told them that he and Raph had gotten in over their heads and that they needed help. And Donatello had been captured. They'd managed to rescue him in time, but it was harrowingly close. Donnie had every right to be mad, but he should be yelling at Leo and Raph.

Leo tried to clear his throat, tried to squeak out his own guilt in the situation and to defend his brother, but all he could manage was, "Donnie, it isn't—Raph's not—"

Donatello laughed bitterly and the sound shook the Hamato Clan. Mikey, with a rare frown on his face, pushed past Master Splinter's stick.

"No, Donnie's right. Raph's temper almost…we almost lost…" That was all he could manage. He averted his eyes when Raph's crestfallen face turned towards him.

Pressing a finger to his temples, Donatello smiled. It was a bitter, vindictive, resentful smile. "Leo's on your side, how ironic. The brother you've injured more times than helped."

"Donnie, stop, it isn't—"

Ignoring the eldest turtle's protest, Don looked Raphael straight in the eyes. "You'll always be my brother, Raphael, but if you can't change, you'll only be putting this family in more and more danger."

Raph turned and burst out in a sprint, past the calm, reassuring hand of his father, and Leo's worried looks. He rushed straight to his room, like a turtle possessed, and bent down, hurriedly feeling around under the bed. He yanked a box from under his bed. On the side of it, in childish scrawl it said: Plan X. He'd always hoped it would never actually happen. He'd started more than once, but he'd never been able to go through with it. Momentary upsets, were easily mended and life went on as it always had, but this...

This wasn't going to go away. He'd never be able to escape from this. So now he'd have to escape his family.

From the 'Plan X' box he grabbed a small satchel. He stuffed it with weapons and meager provisions and started out the door, turning the light off, but he doubled back. Even in the dark, he could see the dull outlines of his brothers in the picture tacked on his wall. With hesitation, he pulled it down and tucked it safely away in his belt pocket.

His temper had nearly gotten Donnie killed, put their entire existence in jeopardy. He was an added danger they couldn't afford. So he'd save them the trouble of getting rid of him.

He was leaving New York. He was leaving the only home he'd ever known. And he was never looking back.

* * *

It was almost midnight before Leonardo was able to wrack up the courage to face Raphael. He went straight to his brother's room and knocked softly on the door. No one answered. Curious, he tried the door and was even more uneasy when he found it unlocked.

The door swung open. Leo poked his head into the room.

"Raph?" He called softly. There was no one inside. He stepped in to get a better look around. Everything seemed to be in its usual place, though he seldom ventured into Raphael's private domain. After all, there was a 'STOP' sign on the door for a reason.

He didn't bother to turn on the lights. If he had, he might have noticed the bare patch on Raph's photo and poster-covered wall.

He headed straight to the dojo. His sudden entrance made the old rat inside break mediation and look up at him questioningly.

"Raph's not in his room."

"Then he has gone out."

"I should—"

"No. Your brother needs time, Leonardo. That is all that we can give him now. Both of them need time."

"You mean Donatello."

Splinter nodded. "Donatello is angry. Sooner or later he will come to his senses and realize that the same quality which got you into the situation, is what got you all out alive."

"Raphael's stubbornness?"

Splinter nodded again. "You four are no longer children, Leonardo, no matter how much my old eyes see otherwise. I cannot sort out these quarrels any longer. You must learn to repair them yourselves. I will not always be here to do it for you."

Leo said nothing to that. The thought of an existence without Master Splinter was just too hard to even think about. He relied heavily upon his Sensei for advice and comfort. He frowned.

"Some of the things Don said were really…I wanna make sure Raph's okay."

His father sighed. "Get some sleep, my son. You may speak with Raphael when he returns in the morning. It is very late."

Leo bowed respectfully to his Sensei and went straight back to his room. He stretched across the bed with a breathy little sigh, but something prevented him from falling asleep right away. Eventually, his eyes closed and he drifted off, his mind blurrily thinking about his family.

They had all taken for granted the fact that Raphael would be back the next day. By the time noon had rolled around and there was still no sign of him, they carried on as usual, though Leo was noticeably uneasy. Raph had holed up in abandoned buildings for the day once or twice before after a bad argument, so they all felt there was nothing to worry about.

But when it came time for evening patrol and his red-masked brother was still nowhere to be found, Leo was worried. He looked up at Mikey, noticing that the youngest seemed a bit concerned at Raph's continued absence.

Don sighed. "Probably holed up with Casey for the weekend," he suggested.

Nodding in agreement, Leo whipped out his t-phone and called their hotheaded brother. A flashing notification, made him pull the phone away from his ear to see the screen. 'Error: Terminated Receiver'. Leo's eye-ridges pulled together.

"Don, what does Terminated Receiver mean?"

Don's head tilted to one side. He was puzzled. "What? Were you calling Raph?"

"Yes."

There was a flicker, just the briefest flicker of barely-masked concern in those deep brown eyes. "It means Raph's t-phone has been permanently deactivated or destroyed."

Leo was more worried than ever. "I'm going to call Casey."

Donnie nodded, but Leo could see from the far-away stare that the brainiac was slowly coming to his senses about Raph. Anger was fading and worry was quickly replacing it.

Leo's fingers tapped nervously on the couch as he waited through what seemed like a million rings for the human hothead, Casey Jones to pick up.

"C'mon Casey…pick up…pick up." He muttered.

"Hmmm—Leo? What's up, dude?"

"Casey, put Raph on."

"Huh?" Casey responded, elegantly.

"My brother, Casey, put him on the phone."

"Raph's not with me, bro."

"Just put him on, Casey." Leo demanded, urgently.

Casey's voice sounded emphatic and touch worried. "He's not with me, Leo!"

Leo's heart fell to the pit of his stomach.

Casey went on, "I haven't seen Raph in like two weeks, dude. Haven't heard from him at all since last Friday. What's up? You guys lost him or something?"

There was no mistaking the worry in Casey's voice now. It was undeniably present.

Leo sighed. "Raph and Donnie had a fight. He left sometime last night."

Casey sigh echoed Leo's and he said, "How bad was it?"

"Scale of one to ten?" Leo asked.

"Radioactive? Or complete nuclear fallout?"

"Probably something closer to the second one." Leo admitted.

Casey swore. Leo could practically envision the human shaking his head from side to side. "Alright, look, I'll do the best I can, but if Raph doesn't want to be found I don't think anyone's gonna be able to find him. Give him a couple days. He'll come back. You know Raph."

Those words made something in Leo's lower back twinge. Sure, he knew Raph, better than some might have thought he did, but…there was something that felt wrong about this. Raph wouldn't do this. He'd know that he was worrying them. Okay, he'd done things like this once or twice in the past, but…this time…something felt…different.

* * *

A full week passed. The turtles were in a complete state of panic. Every night they scoured the city for their missing sibling. Every night, they came home disappointed.

Master Splinter, from where he sat in the dojo, could hear their return and every time he sensed just three sets of light footsteps, his ears sank a little.

That night—a full week from the date of Raphael's disappearance—Leonardo finally dared to enter his brother's room once again. Part of him didn't want to know what Raphael had taken with him, but part of him had to. Carefully, he poked about, neatly cataloguing each and every missing item, or at least, the ones he could recognize as missing. Finally, he turned to Raph's photo wall. When he realized which picture had been removed, it felt as though a little part of him had died. With a primal cry of rage and hurt, Leo took a page from Raphael's book and punched a wall. His knuckles were slowly turning crimson as he dropped to his knees, feeling lost.

His family came running. They burst into Raph's room and stopped flat in the door at what they saw.

"Leo…" Mikey murmured, his voice sounding scared.

Leo didn't look directly at any of them. He stared off into the distance thinking of Raphael. Somehow, his lips managed to form the words: "Raphael's gone."

"What?" Donnie asked, his entire body petrified.

"Raphael is gone." Leo repeated, his faraway gaze drifted even farther and he added, "He might never come back."

* * *

That was three years ago. They had all begun to despair, but surely enough, Raphael had come back. Their brother was different now. So different that Leonardo found that sitting the same room as this new Raphael was like sitting in the same room as a total stranger. That and Raphael was skittish, avoiding too close interactions and getting tense at most kinds of physical contact unless he initiated them himself.

Leo had hoped to put the fight that split them apart behind him. It seemed as though Donnie and Raph had already made up on that point. Raph seemed to spend more time with Donnie than he did with anyone else. But much as Leo wanted to move on, he was stuck on the past. Did Raph know the reason behind his silence way back then? Could Raphael forgive him for not saying more, for not defending him better in the face of Donnie's anger and resentment?

He had no idea. All he knew was that he had to say something because of this not knowing was tearing him apart and wreaking havoc to his sleep schedule. With that thought, he rolled over in bed and forced himself to go to sleep. He'd talk to Raphael first thing in the morning.

* * *

 **Well, how was it? Review Please!**

 **I've been thinking about making a short series based upon this idea, but I don't know. I haven't worked all the kinks out yet. What would you guys say to that? Yes? No? Maybe? Feedback is very much appreciated** **J**


	7. Rescue Mission

**Hey guys, it's been a long time. I've had a lot of trouble getting back in the swing of things this semester, but I think I'm finally getting back on top of things. I published the final chapter of Sleeping Death today and I was determined to get a chapter of this out too. I really hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

 **Ch. 7-Rescue Mission**

"Hey Raph, it's me, bro. Look we were supposed to meet on top of Antonio's Pizza like thirty minutes ago, dude. What's the deal? Call me back." Casey hung up.

Raph was, like, never this late. What the shell was he doing? Didn't the guy realize that Casey would be bored out of his mind waiting all this time? Not cool man. Not cool.

Whoosh. Something landed softly on the rooftop behind him. He didn't need to turn around to know what it was.

"Well, it's about time you showed—up." Casey's voice broke when he turned around. His eyebrows furrowed. "Leo?"

The blue-masked turtle leader crossed his arms. He did not look happy.

"What are you doing here? Where's Raph?"

"The lair, in bed." Leo said dryly.

Anger began clouding Casey's face. What? Raph just ditched him? Gee, thanks Raph.

Seeing these thoughts cross Casey's mind and recognizing the anger for what it was, Leo further elaborated, "With a one-hundred degree fever."

Casey blinked, all the anger evaporating and leaving his body. His eyes scanned Leo carefully. The blue-masked turtle looked weary and worried. And from the way Leo was bouncing from one foot to the other, Casey Jones deduced that the turtle was really anxious.

"Ya could've just called and told me that, man. Ya didn't have to come all the way out here."

Annoyance flickered across Leo's face. "Raph insisted I come out here. He said someone has to make sure you go straight home and don't get into any fights without backup."

"Home? No way I'm going home. The night is young, Leo. And Casey Jones doesn't need any backup."

Leo rubbed his face and groaned. "Casey, please, just make this easier for both of us and go home. Raph was insistent. I have to make sure 'you aren't senselessly endangering your life without one of us to back you up.' I don't know why I had to do it," he grumbled crabbily. "I told him Donnie or Mikey would be a better choice. Heck, April could have done it, but Raph wouldn't listen. He said he wouldn't get any rest at all unless I went to do it. Who knows why."

Understanding dawned on the human. Leo wasn't the sharpest when it came to the difference between what Raph said and what Raph meant, and in his current state, Leo wasn't very likely to realize the truth behind the statement. Many a cold night patrol had Casey Jones spent listening to Raphael unburden himself of his grievances with his brothers. More frequent than not, much time was spent talking about Leonardo 'the mother hen.'

So, Raph sent Leo out here so he could get some rest, huh? Well, who was Casey Jones to deny a friend in need? Mission: Rescue Raph from Big Brother Leo. Besides, Leo looked like he could use a little action.

"Sorry, Blue Leader, but I'm not going. I'm pumped. I need to sweep some scum off the streets, let out some stress, you know what I'm sayin?"

Leo sighed again. "Casey, Raph said not to let you do anything without back up."

"Ah-ah-ah." Casey waggled a finger. "I believe earlier you said 'without one of you guys to back me up' and the way I see it, I've got one."

"Casey, I don't have time for this. I need to get back. Raph needs—"

"Don't worry 'bout it. Donnie and Mikey are there, right? And Splinter?"

Leo's eye-ridges furrowed and his eyes widened. "Well…yeah, but—" he rubbed the back of his neck uncertainly.

"Loosen up, Leo." Casey swung an arm around Leo's shoulders. "We're gonna have a night on the town, Casey Jones style!"

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that."

* * *

"Wait, seriously? You've never pied anybody before? You've gotta be kidding me!"

"Isn't pieing illegal? And what about the cost?"

"Aww, lighten up, Leo. That's why you don't waste money on actual pies. You just use whipped cream. Come on." Casey disappeared through a hole in the side of a large warehouse.

Leo crept slowly after him. He looked around. The inside of the place seemed decently stable. Casey was leaning against an open freezer looking like the cat that ate the cream…or in this case, the cat that stashed the cream. There were tubs and tubs of cheap, frozen whipped topping.

"Where did you get the money for all of that?"

"It was a super sale, bro, four for a dollar. Each one makes two extra creamy pie-tin surprises!"

Leo cast a sideways glance at the human. "Casey," he said, straining to keep his voice very level.

"Yeah, Leo?" Casey smiled.

"Promise me, by all that is sane and rational, that you will never, ever, show this place to Michelangelo."

Casey smirked. "On one condition."

Leo glared. "Name it."

The smirk widened.

Leo's face changed. His eyes widened and he vehemently shook his head. "No, no, no, no, no!"

* * *

"Casey…" Leo whined, unhappily. "What are we doing here, this is the Dragon's place!"

"Shhhh!" Casey rolled his eyes. "Gee, I thought ninjas were supposed to be silent." He stuck his head into the alley and looked both ways. All clear. He turned to his 'sidekick'. "Pie me," he whispered.

Leo frowned, and handed Casey a pie from the gigantic, shelved box they'd crammed into Casey's sidecar. Casey crept up to the door of the Purple Dragon's place and knocked loudly. Confident that this wasn't going to end well, Leo stayed near the bike.

The door opened and Fong's narrow face peered out. Casey stood to one side, just out of sight. Fong looked around. "Hello?"

"Special Delivery!" Casey shouted, smashing the creamy pie in the Purple Dragon's face.

Fong spluttered, and finally yanked it off, wiping the cream from his eyes. "What the—why you little—It's that idiot Hockey-Mask friend of the turtles!"

Casey laughed long and loud. "It's Casey Jones to you!"

"Get him!"

Making faces, Casey retreated just as the door was thrown off its hinges. Casey's face fell. "Oh, man."

Rahzar and Hun burst through, in a fury. Leo jumped up and unsheathed his swords, but Casey stayed his hand.

"No way, dude. Why use weapons, when we could use sweet whipped goodness?"

Leo smirked and nodded. They each pulled two more pies from the box and rushed at their enemies.

"Hey Rahzar," Leo called.

Bradford turned and was blinded by whipped topping.

"How's that taste?"

Casey smiled and slammed a whipped pie into Hun's face. They turned to high-five—er—three each other. "Yeah! Sweet. Let's blow this popsicle stand!"

Leo hopped into Casey's sidecar and slipped on his helmet.

"More like whipped cream stand."

"Boy it's a good thing there aren't any of those around. If there were I'd probably gain twenty pounds!" Casey said, laughing.

Leo laughed with him. It was a real laugh, not a forced one, and it made Casey feel good. Really good. The blue-masked turtle had needed a break from all that responsibility and worry he'd been buried under. Raph was a smart guy, Casey mused, especially when it came to his brothers and what they needed. And when all was said and done, Leonardo wasn't half bad. In fact, he was one of the best pieing sidekicks he'd ever had—second only to Raph.

Raph was an evil pie-thrower. Not only was his aim spot on, but he wasn't afraid of pieing anyone. Anyone. They'd even pied ol' Shredhead once. Man, if Casey ever let word of that little adventure slip, Leo would go ape on them both. His glanced over at the turtle, who looked to be contented, occasionally still giggling from the dastardly deeds of the night.

Good thing he'll never know, Jones thought.

* * *

By the time Leo got back to the lair, it was almost two o'clock in the morning. He was more relaxed than he had been in quite a while.

That relaxation was quickly lost when he saw Raphael lying on the couch in the main room. Annoyance flooded him. Dammit, Raph. He stomped over to the back of the couch and glared down, but the expression instantly melted off of his face. Raphael was curled up with plenty of blankets, fast asleep. On his forehead was a sticky-note that went up and down with each of his light, even snores. Leo peeled it off. It was in Donnie's distinct, crab-like printing.

'The hothead is no longer dangerously hotheaded. His fever broke a few hours ago. He ate a good dinner. I tried to get him to bed, but this meathead insisted on staying up to watch television. As you can probably tell, that didn't last long. Gave him plenty of blankets and left him to rest.'

He murmured mild admonitions, tugging the blankets up a little and tucking them in softly, summing them up with, "Goodnight, little brother. Get well soon."

Leo turned and headed back to his room, unaware of the little smile at the corner of Raph's mouth. Two three-fingered hands reached out of the blankets and typed a short message to Casey Jones:

Ey Casey…Thanks

* * *

 **Man, it has been a long time since I've done one of these. How was it?**


	8. From the Heart

**Warning! SPOILER ALERT!**

 **IF YOU HAVE NOT YET WATCHED THE SEASON 4 FINALE OF THE NICKELODEON SERIES AND INTEND TO WATCH IT, DO NOT READ THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE IT CONTAINS REFERENCE TO MAJOR SPOILERS!**

 **That said, enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

 **Ch. 8-From the Heart**

It should have been me. It needed to be me. I should have been the one. I should have been the one to rip the metal from his face. I'd have liked my face to be the last thing he'd ever seen.

But the deed is done. It's over. Whatever we face now in our lives, we can rest knowing he is dead. I only wish I had been the one to finish him off. After everything he did…after everything we suffered—

Of course it had to be Leo! It always was! Leo is the best of us. It had to be Leo…but it needed to be me. I needed to see his lifeless body on the ground. I needed to feel his blood slicken my fingers. I needed to impale him on his own spikes and hear him take his last breath. I needed watch him die the way my father died.

There was no mercy in me that night. Even leaving Xever to suffocate on that beach was not enough to quench my blood thirst. I wanted them to die. I wanted them all to die _slowly_.

Leo keeps spinning yarns about how Splinter isn't really gone, that his spirit is with us, always. Maybe it is, but there's no way I'd be able to reach it. Sensei said it himself: my mind is not strong enough as long as it's clouded by anger.

The fire of my anger burns brighter now than ever before.

Leo just doesn't get it. He doesn't understand. Leo will never understand like Sensei.

My hand rose to brush the tear from my cheek before Leo could notice. We're in the middle of another fight.

It's been a few weeks since he finished Shredder, and already it feels like all we ever do is argue. We haven't dealt with anything but Purple Dragons lately, and the boredom is too much to take. I constantly feel like the walls are closing in. I just have to escape.

Why won't he just let me go? It's like he wants to pen me in the sewers like his little pet. Doesn't he get it?

I took one look at my big brother's face as he opened his mouth to continue his tirade, which I've been ignoring. I don't bother listening anymore. I've heard it all before.

Can't he see how badly I need this?

No, of course not. Of course he doesn't get it. He never will.

* * *

With every word, I felt—with growing certainty and annoyance—that Raph was completely ignoring me. He'd tuned out, like he so often did nowadays. Just what is it going to take to get through to him? Do I have to spell it out?

"Raph, going out and looking for trouble isn't going to do anyone any good! Can't you see that you're just—"

"Leonardo," Splinter appeared behind Raph, placing his hand on my red-masked brother's shoulder, "Let him go."

I looked into the eyes of my father's spirit and closed my eyes. "Just go, Raph."

Like he had been jostled awake from a nap, my brother blinked. "Leo?"

"I said go. Try to be back before curfew."

He didn't wait to be told again. I turned around and when I glanced back, he was gone. Splinter's spirit drifted over to me.

"Already you have forgotten my final lesson," he said gravely.

I frowned. "Father?"

"I told you. You must be their Sensei now. You decisions must come from here," his finger pointed to my chest, "not here," they drifted up to my forehead. He bent down and looked me in the eyes. "You have defeated the Shredder, his empire has fallen. What now remains to be done will prove your greatest challenge yet, Leonardo. You must keep this family whole. To do that, you will need to hear the feelings your brothers hide. Go to them, my son. Go and find out."

Splinter crossed his arms.

I started towards the door of the dojo and turned back. "But Father, wouldn't it be easier for you to just tell me?"

"Simply knowing will not be enough, my son. You must learn for yourself."

When I turned to close the dojo doors behind me, my father's spirit had vanished. I sighed and let my shoulders droop. His final lesson…

I pulled my shoulders back and lifted my chin, my lack of confidence replaced with sheer determination.

"Alright, Leo. From here," I whispered, my hand resting on my heart.

* * *

I didn't say anything to Leo when I saw him come out of the dojo. Didn't want to risk getting my head bitten off. I don't want a repeat of the lecture Raph just got. Seems like that's most of what Leo does nowadays. Even training has gotten a lot like a lecture now. I'm…I'm scared.

I'm scared that one day Raph won't come home, or Donnie will lose himself in his lab and Leo…

Leo will lock himself in the dojo. I hear him when he's alone in there sometimes…talking to Sensei.

The television drowns the uneasy silence that's been lingering between the four of us this past week. That's why I've been laying on the floor pretending to watch it. So that none of my brothers realize I'm actually watching them.

Leo walks past me, and my gaze drifts to the door. I would have gone after Raph if he weren't such an emotional mess right now. He tries to hide it, the same way Leo and Donnie do, but his brave-face doesn't fool me. I know him too well for that. Hope he's not out super long. If he's not back by midnight, I'll go after him.

I had a feeling Leo would too. If that happens, I hope I get to him first. Last thing Raph needs is another lecture.

I almost jumped out of my shell when Leo's voice cut short my thoughts.

"Hey."

"Hey big bro," I answered, pasting on a smile.

"How's it going, Mikey?"

I stalled for a second or two, but not long enough for things to get awkward.

With a beaming smile, I answered, "Aw, life is good, Leo. Ice cream kitty and I made pizza! Algae, anchovies and worms! Want some?" I reached over to grab the box and show him my latest masterpiece.

He grimaced and sat down on the couch, waving it off.

"No thanks, Mikey. I don't have quite the scrap-iron stomach that you do." He looked sheepish.

I put the pizza box down and waved it off with a smile. "Aw, no pressure, bro. Long as you say no, there's more for me." I pointed out.

Leo grinned. I smile back. It's the first time we've just chilled together since we went black-mask on Shredder. Or really since Sensei…

I don't want to think about that and I don't want my big brother to see the tears in my eyes, so I turn back to the television. We both watch, in silence, for a few minutes.

 _"Come, Hansen, we have to make it through the jungle!"_

 _"But Doctor Stone, there's a wall of limestone blocking our path! What are we gonna do?"_

 _SLAP!_

 _"We do what we always do, Hansen! We go around! This way!"_

I've never seen this show before. I don't even know the name of it, or even what channel it's on, but it doesn't matter, because I'm not really watching. I'm thinking about my brothers. I'm afraid…afraid that my family is falling apart. That it will shatter as easily as an egg and all the contents will disperse, and I, the yolk, will split and all my runny mushy emotional contents will come pouring out. Then there won't really be a yolk anymore, only a smear of yellow-orange goop. My brothers hold me in place as much as I like to think I do for them.

 _"Doctor! It's a wall of sandstone!"_

 _"Drat! There's no other choice, Hansen! We'll have to go back and try going around the other way."_

I don't even want to think of a world without my brothers standing beside me. I never wanted to think of one without Splinter either, but…here we are.

 _"Doctor it's no good! It's a wall of shale! What are we gonna do?"_

 _SLAP_

 _"Hansen, there is always another way! All we have to do now is find it!"_

I was so deeply lost in thought that I had completely forgotten my older brother's presence behind me.

"Michelangelo," he began.

I looked back at him, concerned by the use my full name, but the confusion etched in his features made me stare.

"I called you, like, four times."

Oh, so that was it. I must have been really zoned out.

Leo glanced briefly at the television, then fixed his gaze on me.

"Mikey, what the shell are we watching?"

I, too, looked at the screen, before answering, "I don't really know. Some kind of jungle saga." I could feel his sharp blue eyes examining me, searching, the way they always did, for the answer to some unvoiced question of his own. Just as he opened his mouth, a deep-voiced television promotion declared:

 _"New, never before-aired episodes of The Jungle Saga next week! Only on TV Flopouts!"_

I grinned, feeling pleased with myself. I am so good at naming stuff.

The whine of the television shutting down snapped me out of it. Leo offered me a hand up. I took it cautiously, slightly afraid he was going to make me train, or even worse, make me meditate for the next few hours. Instead he lay a hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes.

"Why were you really watching that, Mikey?"

I laughed it off, though even I knew my fake laugh was less than convincing.

"Aw, come on, Leo! You know how much I love trash TV! It's fall-off-your-chair funny, bro!"

His stern expression wavered. His voice and posture softened. "Mikey."

My brothers treat me like a baby most of the time. That has its benefits and its pitfalls. On the one hand, it allows me to be free from a lot of the worry and stress that they are constantly under, on the other, it shows me exactly what lengths they'll go to in order to 'shield' me from the burdens that they carry. Because of that, no one knows better than I do, how each of my brothers feels at any given moment, and how they deal with the emotional weight that they carry. I've always done everything I could to repay them for that. To make them smile or laugh, to help them momentarily forget their burdens, that has always been my goal.

But right now, standing in front of Leonardo, I can see that laughter and smiles are not what he needs. There's something else we have to do first. Something we have to let out in the open. It hovers in the air between us like an unspoken apology. So much needs to be said.

Don can't say it. Raph can't say it. It has to be me. Other moments had been for laughter and smiles. This one was for truth. I'm not the serious type, but now I have to mold myself into a semblance of one. I have to let the deeper, darker part of me show its face.

"It isn't working, Leo." I whispered, my voice low and choked.

"I know." He turned away from me. Then in a lower tone, he added, "Splinter told me."

Suddenly feeling very weary, I deflated and murmured. "It's already begun falling apart. We're pulling away. Don's locked in the lab. Raph's topside. You're in the dojo. And I'm in here doing nothing about it."

"It isn't your job to do, Mikey."

I scoff. "Then whose is it? Yours?" I knew the answer from the way he straightened his back and lifted his chin. "If you think you can pull this family back together all on your lonesome, you're wrong, Leo. I thought you were smarter than that. No one of us can mend the breaks. It's gotta be the four of us. Together, we might get through this."

"Might?"

"It's going to take more than lectures to get us there."

If that angered Leo, he didn't show it, which comforted me a little. I decided to clear the air even further and lay all my cards on the table.

"I'm scared, Leo."

His gaze snapped up and met mine just as I expected it would.

"You all pushed me away because it's the only way you guys could deal with the pain. We just don't know how to cope. We're drifting, all of us, and who knows where we'll end up: in different cities across the country, abandoned sewer monitoring stations, lying bloody and beaten in a dumpster, or buried at the farmhouse by our father's side." I stopped there. All the blood had drained from my big brother's face. "I'm afraid, big brother. If things keep on going the way they are, one of these days, we're going to lose someone else, and that would destroy us all."

I was shocked by the sudden sensation of warm arms wrapping tightly around me.

"I'm not going to let that happen." Leo whispered determinately. " _We're_ not going to let that happen," He corrected, pulling back slightly to look me in the eyes.

For the first time since my father's death, I felt something sliding back into place. Something warm and fulfilling that could bind our shattered universe back together again: unwavering, indiscriminate, unconditional love. My arms rose and I squeezed my brother tightly.

* * *

Thunk. Thunk. Thunk.

Hmmmguh-huh? What the, who was—Door. Someone's at the door. Sleepy…Had I fallen asleep?

I turned my head toward the door and blinked sleepily at it.

"Donnie? It's Leo. Can I come in?"

I stretched my arms and yawned. "Sure," I yelled, my voice slurry.

Leo cleared his throat pointedly and I lifted my head.

"I said, sure."

"The door's locked, Don."

I sat up and stared. Leo was right. It was locked. A bitter laugh escaped me, "Haha. Sorry Leo. Coming."

I got up and trudged to the door. I pulled it open and leaned in the doorway. My big brother gave me a weak smile.

"What's up?"

"You look tired. Is this a bad time?"

I shook my head. "No, guess I fell asleep at the lab table."

"Well if you'd like to rest—"

"No, no, it's okay. What's up?"

Leo looked uncertain. It was odd. He's been pretty self-assured these past few weeks, or at least, he's been acting like it. Not that it's done much good. It's been hard for all of us. Adjusting to life without our father…isn't easy. The constant arguments aren't helping much either. I think it's been bothering Mikey as much as it's been bothering me. He's been in the main room pretending to watch TV all day. Bet he thinks no one knows he was pretending. Ha.

My brothers think that the entirety of my unusually large brain is devoted to schematics, mechanics and equations. Mikey thinks he can hide behind a happy-go-lucky mask all the time and no one will notice.

"Can I come in?" Leo asked, dispersing my thoughts.

I stood there staring a little bit longer than I should have. My older brother's face fell. I flung the door open and stepped back.

Leo accepted the silent invitation and pushed past me into the lab. To my great confusion, he took a seat on my examination table. Worry rose in my gut. I stayed standing, my eyes silently scanning for signs of injury or illness. I couldn't find anything, but that didn't mean that nothing was wrong.

None of my brothers enjoy being in medical section of the lab. Of course, when they end up there it isn't as though they have a choice. If there's one thing my brother Leo hates, it's being powerless. Yet here he is, sitting on my examination table of his own free will. Since he hasn't said anything yet there's no way of knowing whether he's here for medical aid or for something else entirely.

Something in his entire approach makes me think that he sat there on purpose. He wants me to feel like the one in control here. That's also why he's being so hyperactively conscious of me. Even now I can see how hard he's trying to analyze my posture. His eyes are watching me like a hawk, picking out every little detail and entering it into his data banks. Hmm. The way I'm talking. I make him sound like a computer.

Oddly enough, though, Leo's been acting like an automaton. He's been that way for the past few weeks, just a vacuous shell, carrying out the mundane routine of everyday life.

But then, who am I to talk? I've been locked up in my lab these past four days.

"Donnie, I doubt you'll argue with me when I say that I owe my little brothers an apology."

For a solid five seconds, the words hung in the air, before my hand slammed down on the table. A few of my blueprints fluttered off and onto the floor. The rage in my heart had all rushed to my hands and they shook violently as I stared my big brother coolly in the eyes.

"You owe your little brothers your comfort and support. Are you our brother or are you a soulless drone? Take your pick Leo, because you can't be both!" I saw him shudder, but I couldn't stop myself. "I'm so fed up I've been locked up in my lab, Raph is probably ready to gouge your eyes out, and Mikey's in the living room pretending to be his normal self and failing miserably! Splinter is gone, Leo, and you expect us to act the same way? You expect everything to be peachy, don't you? You think that you can just treat us the exact same way you did before, well you can't, Leo! It doesn't work that way. Splinter is gone and nothing is ever going to be the same. The sooner you wise up and realize that, the better. Now that he's gone you can't be the same way you were before. When we're in the field, we need a leader, but right now, we need a brother."

I looked away, turning my carapace to him and murmuring, "There's a big difference between thinking and doing, Leo. Master Splinter taught me that. Don't spend all your time in your head. If you do, you'll never be able to truly succeed. Take it from a turtle that knows."

When I turned back to Leo, I was momentarily taken aback. He looked stricken. The color had drained from his face. His arms fell limply at his sides.

"Donnie…"

I could see the telling gleam of tears in his eyes. I rushed and threw my arms around him. Immediately, I regretted speaking so harshly. I was not the only one who had lost a father. Why should my speech be so selfish and aggressive? The fault was as much mine as it was his. I had withdrawn from our family when I should have stayed and comforted my siblings. The tension that had grown these past few weeks was not the burden of any one of us, but all of us. It would take all four of us to make it go away. I started to apologize, but Leonardo cut me off.

"No, Donnie. I needed to hear it." He hugged me a little tighter and whispered, "Thank you."

* * *

Pouring rain. It was coming down in sheets. I wasn't really sure how much time had passed since the fight with Leo. However long it had been, it wasn't long enough. As I reached down to my belt for my t-phone I checked the time.

Dammit. Only an hour till curfew. I don't want to go back down. I'm not ready to face Leo. Gotta admit I acted like a jerk. Just wish he'd lighten up and try to see my side of things once in a while. He's an awesome brother, but sometimes he gets a little too preachy and it busts my buttons.

This run was supposed to help me cool off after—well—everything that happened. The rain has certainly cooled me down, but only on the outside. Inside, I'm still burning with rage. I want to hit something. Much as I'd love to find some Purple Dragons to mess with, I'm afraid that, in my current state of rage, I'd send them all to the hospital if not the morgue. Pathetic punks they may be, but they don't deserve that.

It's funny, but once you stand in the rain long enough it gets so cold that it feels like it's almost burning and the burn feels good. It feels so good. There's nothing better than rain.

Normally I close my eyes and listen to the sounds it makes, but not tonight. I've had trouble closing my eyes since Master Splinter died. Every time I do all I see is...Shredder creeping up behind him, me, too weak and powerless to help and then, the final blow. How I wish I could have hurled myself in front of those blades and thrown my father backward. One of the first things I learned about this world is that wishes don't come true, at least, mine never do.

My brothers don't even realize the strain that I'm under. April knows, because she was right beside me. She's come down to the lair a few times this past week. They were all so confused when she said she wanted to just chill with me for a little bit. They haven't really thought about it. I'm sure that seeing Splinter's body drop and crash to the pavement was traumatic too, but I had to see the blades. I had to hear the slice and my father's gasp. I had to hear April's cries and Shredder's triumph. I had to watch my father die at the hands of a monster for the second time.

Only this time, there was no time travel. No going back. No fixing it.

"You know if you stay out here in the rain too long you're going to get a cold."

"Fuck off, Fearless. I'll be home later. It's an hour till curfew."

"I talked to Donnie. He said you were about ready to gouge my eyes out." Leo said, ignoring my dismissal.

Since Leo obviously wasn't interested in leaving, I played along. "So you finally got around to talking to Donnie, eh? About time. Guess you're finally taking notice of us little people."

"I deserve that after the way I've been these past few weeks."

"And a shell of a lot more," I growled.

He crossed the rooftop and sat on the ledge beside me. Our eyes finally met. If he was crying his tears were lost in the rain, just like mine.

"Raphael, Splinter left me with a final lesson, and I—I failed it. I'm asking you, little brother, to forgive me."

I just stared at him.

"Please. So we can move beyond this."

I looked down at the alley below our feet. "You don't understand, Leo."

That was all it took. He exploded. "The shell do you mean I don't understand? We've all lost a father! I feel like no one can ever understand, Raphael! I feel like no one will ever know or relate to the confusion, the bewilderment, the insecurity, the shock, and the fear that I felt that day. Or the terror, the heartbreak, the pain…You're not alone. Goddammit, Raphael, that day Splinter told me that when he was gone, I had to think with my heart and not my head, and if that can't make you feel like I understand, then I don't know what will!"

Every muscle in my body tensed. My blood froze in my veins. I stared at him. "W-What did you say?"

Something in my voice must have given me away.

Leo's gaze snapped up and a flicker of wariness danced across his eyes. He had heard the grating tinge of danger in my tone and as I jumped to my feet he did the same. I repeated my question.

"What did you say?"

He still didn't answer. He must have known that I didn't really need him to repeat it. I had heard every word. Heard and internalized every single word. I moved towards him.

"Why didn't you say anything?" My voice had dropped to a low, dangerous pitch.

Leo looked confused and afraid. He backed away slightly as I continued to stalk forward.

"What do you mean?"

"It was _that_ day? He said that on _that_ day and you didn't say anything?" My low tone vanished and my volume rose, "When?"

"Just before we split up."

I'm sure that my green eyes were glowing with hurt and rage, because Leo looked torn between taking another step back and coming forward.

"Why? Why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you say something to me?" I asked, my voice failing me, breaking and screeching under the emotional strain. "How could you?"

"What difference would it have made? He'd still be gone, Raph!" Leo shouted.

With a cry of primal rage, I pinned my brother to the rooftop, tossing him plastron-down into a puddle, spraying us both with muddy water.

"You should have told me!" I practically screamed.

"What could you have done?!" Leo yelled over the rain, his head pinned to one side, he looked up as best he could, at my face, and suddenly I saw his mind sliding all the pieces into place. "Holy shit, Raph…I—I didn't think…"

"Of course you didn't." I snarled. "I watched our father die, Leo. I watched it all over again. I had to watch him ram his blades through my father's body and toss him off the building. Don't pretend like you understand. You won't be haunted by those images the way I am. You won't hear that sickening slice and Splinter's gasp. You won't hear April's screams in your ears, or the dull cries of your brothers from the street below as they watch the body fall. Every time I close my eyes, it's there and it will be there for a long time. If you'd told me. If you'd just told me that Splinter had said—"

"What could you have done?" Leo asked, staring sternly at me.

I squared my shoulders and let him up, my rage fading to an ember. "I could have been prepared." I threw all my intentions, all my wishes into that simple statement. Judging by the look on his face, Leo understood.

"To take his place." He sounded awed and horrified. With conviction, he said lowly, "Splinter wouldn't have wanted that, Raph."

"I know. But I still wouldn't have hesitated."

Leo knocked the air out of my lungs with a strangling hug. I grunted, but returned it with fervor. For the next few minutes we just stood there, sharing our pain, and drowning our tears in rain.

* * *

When Raphael and I finally got back to the lair, Mikey and Donnie were in the common room waiting up for us. They eyed us with hesitation and interest. Mikey spoke first.

"Whoa. You guys look like you went mud wrestling."

"You're soaked. You better take all that wet gear off before you catch a cold." Don said.

"Glad to see you're back to playin' Doctor, Donnie." Raph said with a grin.

"I've never been off duty, Raph." Don dipped into the lab and re-emerged with a couple clean towels. "Dry up. I don't think any of us want to be stuck cleaning a muddy lair."

After handing the towels to me, Donnie returned the couch in the common room. I handed a towel to Raph.

Mikey came over to us beaming happily, "Hey guys! Donnie and I were gonna watch TV trash all night long, wanna join?"

I smiled and nodded, "Count me in. Raph?"

Mikey's face turned to our red-masked sibling. Raph looked oddly unsure. My eye-ridges furrowed. From what Raph confessed earlier, I imagine he hasn't been resting very easy lately. I'm very concerned that he's been punishing himself for Splinter's death more than I realized. Now he blames me for not telling him what Splinter had said, though I think he understands why I didn't.

As though he could read minds, Mikey's face fell a little. "I get it, bro. You're all exhausted. Don't worry about it, maybe next time."

Raph sighed. "Alright knucklehead. Don't get all sad about it. I'll stick around for a couple hours, but then I'm going to bed."

I smiled and nodded gratefully to Raph. He grinned wanly and nodded unobtrusively back.

We settled down in front of the television and watched until we fell asleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I found all three of my brothers lying against me, still sound asleep. I smiled down at their peaceful faces, and looked up to see our father's spirit smiling lovingly at the four of us. Splinter nodded approvingly at me and I grinned dreamily, allowing myself to fall back into a quiet slumber.

"Well done, my sons. This is but the beginning of a long and arduous journey. Always remember each other, and always know that I am here. I love you all, my sons."

* * *

 **How was it? Review please!**


	9. Going Pro

**I know it's been a really long time guys. I haven't had as much time to write as I would have liked to lately, but I am determined to write as much as I can over these next few days. I've also been lacking inspiration. Hope you enjoy this chapter, this is a fun little bit I whipped up today.**

* * *

 **Ch. 9-Going Pro**

"Leo," Raph grumbled.

"Shh. Keep your eyes open."

The hothead scoffed. "For what?"

Leonardo locked his jaw, pulled his grappling hook gun off his back, fired, and swung over the busy street without another word.

Raphael rolled his eyes and followed suit. He crept up beside his brother, who was peering over the building's edge at the people below. Raph briefly wondered how those humans would feel if they knew that two mutant turtle brothers were watching them. Well, one turtle brother. The other was wondering why his stick-up-the-ass big brother wouldn't just call it a night so they could go home already.

"C'mon, Leo, let's go. There's nothing to see out here."

Leo's breath was visible against the night sky. It was early April, but the winter chill still clung in the air. Leonardo didn't even bother to acknowledge Raph's words.

"Wait," He instructed.

The glare Raph shot at his elder brother's back went unseen. Seeing no alternative but to indulge his brother until he could come up with another plan, Raph cast his eyes over the people below.

"Wow. Look over there, Leo, a jaywalker. We should totally give him a beat-down for not looking both ways." Raph looked up at Leo. No visible response.

Okay, a swing and a miss. Strike one. He turned back to the people below, fixing his gaze on a young woman in her mid-twenties who was rapidly darting through the crowd. She was looking for something.

"Oh look, Leo, she seems to be lost." As soon as he said it, however, the woman's face lit up and she ran straight into the open arms of a handsome young man. They hugged each other like they'd been apart for a million years.

Raph pouted and crossed his arms over his chest, "Ain't that just as mushy as two-month old sewage?" He glanced at Leo. No reaction.

Another swing and another miss. Damn. At this rate they'd never get home, and even if they did, Mikey and Donnie would be in control of the television. A bright flash down below drew his attention. He rubbed his eyes and looked back down, his head drew in towards his shell as he made a face.

"Socks, sandals, neon green brand-logo covered sweats, dark brown shirt, and a yellow-checkered jacket that makes him look like a walking taxi cab. Where are the fashion police when you need them? That guy should be indicted and placed in a museum as an example to future generations. 'Exhibit 18, one of the most extreme cases of fashion blindness to ever walk the streets of New York City, no matter what you end up doing in life kids, don't ever, EVER, dress like this.'" He said, in an artificially cheery voice, mimicking a tour-guide.

He glanced over at Leo and was surprised to find blue eyes meeting his own. Finally, he had scored. His brother actually noticed his existence. Yay. Now what?

"Since when do you care about fashion?"

The question surprised him, though it really shouldn't have. He'd gotten Leo's attention. Now all he had to do was keep it long enough to convince his brother to end patrol early and head back to the lair.

"Since never. Doesn't mean I don't know right from wrong. That wardrobe is just wrong."

"Based on what?"

Raph scoffed. "You telling me you that you can't see just by looking that that outfit doesn't work?"

Leo looked down. He grimaced. "It is…faintly nauseating."

"The prosecution rests."

That brought a fleeting grin to Leo's lips. "Alright, Raph. I get the hint. We're all clear here. No trouble in sight."

"Finally!" Raph tapped Leo's shoulder. "Come on bro, last one to the lair is a sewer apple." He dashed across the roof, and suddenly realized that Leo wasn't beside him. He turned around. Leo was still sitting on the building's edge watching the people.

"Let's just hang out and watch the people for a little longer."

"Why?"

"Because it's interesting." Leo patted the spot next to him. "You can do commentary."

Raphael shifted from one foot to the other.

Sensing his brother's hesitation Leo asked, "You in some kind of rush, Raph?"

"No."

If Leo weren't reptilian and he had outer ears, they would have perked up. That answer had come much too quickly. It was an obvious lie.

"I know when you're lying. What's up?"

"Wrestlemania is on tonight. I wanna catch it."

Leo shook his head. "Seriously? Pro-Wrestling? Why do you even watch that stuff? It's totally fake."

Raph's arms crossed defensively over his chest. "Yeah, I know that it's fake. Everybody knows that Leo. Geez. You're one to talk! You've never even watched it."

"Why should I? They're just grown men trying to beat the shit out of each other. And why watch it when I know that it is totally fake?"

Raph's glare could have melted steel.

"Alright, so yeah, it's fake, but that just makes it even more impressive. You watch kung fu movies all the time!"

Defensiveness set in. Their stance and expressions were the same. Both brothers had their arms crossed over their chests and were glaring daggers at each other.

"Kung Fu movies are totally different."

"Hmm, let's see. One character is pitted against another character and they compete in a choreographed matchup where one wins and the other loses. No, they don't sound alike at all."

"Raphael's over-the-top-sarcasm strikes again."

The hothead's growl was like rolling thunder. Then his face lightened, his eyes grew greener, and his mouth curled into a smirk. Leo had no idea what Raph was thinking, but whatever it was, it was bound to be devious.

"Alright, Fearless, I'll make you a deal. You and me. Right here, right now. Raphael and Leonardo going face to face in a street fight. No disqualification and falls count anywhere. Which, for the wrestling impaired—"

Leo was not amused by the jab and his expression said as much.

"Means that anything goes, including weapons, and if someone gets pinned no matter where they are at, it's over. Well, Fearless? Do you accept the challenge?"

Baring his katanas down on his younger sibling, Leo chuckled as Raph made a startled sound and just slid out of the way. "How's that for an answer?"

Raph drew his sai and smiled. "You catch on quick."

Their blades clashed and their feet danced to the familiar tune of their intense rivalry. They had always competed fiercely over everything and now, here they were, yet again, circling, each gauging the other. Leo expected Raph to cave first, as usual, but the hothead only continued to circle.

Patient as the leader was, after about two minutes of circling, enough was enough. Leo moved first. Raph blocked with his sai and swept his brother's legs out from under him, and using the momentum to push Leo into a roll-up.

"One, two—"

Leo twisted and kicked violently out of it. "What the shell was that?!"

"That, bro, is a pinfall maneuver called the roll-up." Raph said patronizingly. Leo retrieved his katana and charged, but Raph swept out of the way and kicked one of the blades out of Leo's hand.

The elder turtle reacted faster than Raph had anticipated and his blue-masked brother grabbed his leg. In a daring gamble, Raph brought up his other leg up to deliver a hard enziguri to the side of Leo's head.

Tottering slightly, Leo dropped his guard. That split second was all Raph needed. He seized the opportunity to grab Leo, lift his older brother into the air, and bring him down to the roof with a thud.

Leo didn't know what hit him. The world spun and suddenly, Raphael was leaning over him counting.

"One…two…three…DING-DING-DING! Here is your winner and the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Champion…RAPHAEL!" Raph did a victory dance, noting that Leo had sat up and was watching him. The ninja Leader looked annoyed. That only made Raph's smirk widen.

"Are you finished?" Leo asked, crabbily.

With a big smile Raph said, "You know what? Not quite." He busted a few more moves. "Okay. I'm good."

"You better be."

Raphael laughed. "Still think Wrestling is a waste of time? You could stand to pick up a move or two."

"And let me guess, you're going to teach me?"

"Sure, but not until after we're done watching the greatest matches of all time. We're gonna start at the beginning and work our way forward."

They walked side-by-side, stride for stride, bumping into each other playfully. Leo put his hand on Raph's head and shoved his younger brother over a few feet. The hothead punched Leo in the shoulder.

"I'm not sure what to fear more: your teaching skills, or a couple hundred hours of men hitting each other with folding chairs and trash-can lids."

"And sometimes tables," Raph added, a beaming smile stretching across his face. Almost as an afterthought he sent on, "and ladders."

Leo stopped mid-step. What the shell had he gotten himself into?

* * *

 **One week later...**

"Alright, guys, we split up from here, cover more ground. Anything unusual happens, call in. No heroics, we clear?" Leonardo looked each of his brothers in the eye lingering pointedly on Michelangelo and Donatello.

Mikey stared owlishly back at Leo. Don nodded, though his eyes darted over to their hotheaded sibling with a flicker of interest.

"Don, take Mikey and head that way. Raph and I will go this way."

Okay, so that was why that 'no heroics' comment was directed at them and not Raph. This was the third time Leo had paired off with Raph on their patrols this week. Not that it was a bad thing. There hadn't been much activity these past few days, and nothing was grumpier than a Raphael who hadn't had any villains to eviscerate lately. But therein lay the curious point.: a grumpy Raph and a focused Leo never mixed. When Raph was grumpy, Leo usually paired him off with Mikey. Michelangelo was the only one of the four of them who could manage a grumpy Raphael while sustaining minimal injuries.

Raph and Leo took off, leaving their younger brothers alone on the rooftop.

Mikey looked over at his brainiac brother. Donnie had his thinking face on.

"Psh. As if we're gonna get into trouble. When was the last time we got in over our heads? Like last year?"

Thinking face still on, Don appropriated the question, "When was the last time any of us were in over our heads? We haven't seen much action at all these last couple weeks, and yet Leo just paired himself with Raph for the third time this week."

"Better him than us."

A nondescript sound of agreement was made and silence returned. Don puzzled over his older siblings' behavior for a few seconds longer before Mikey's voice once again severed his moment of thought.

"I don't want to have to listen to Raph's voice all patrol long. Seriously, the guy hardly lets Leo get a word in edge-wise." Mikey started off in the direction Leo had indicated.

By the time Mikey's words registered, Don looked up and realized that his little brother was three rooftops away. He sprinted and, due mostly to his long legs, easily caught up. He flipped onto the roof and landed next to his brother.

"Sick flips, bro! You've been practicing!"

Don probed unobtrusively, "At least Raph didn't seem too irritable. Hopefully that's a good thing."

Mikey shrugged, "Never can tell with him."

"True."

"Those two sure have been acting weird lately," Mikey said. At the look he received, he added, "More than usual."

Another sound of agreement came from Donnie.

"They've actually been talking, like without throwing punches at each other."

Donatello's eye-ridges rose. "Mikey they aren't exactly enemies. They exchange words more often than you might think."

"Yeah, but most of the time those words include 'You're such a hothead!' and 'At least I'm not a stick up the—"

"I get the point."

"Lately all they've been talking about is matches."

"Matches? You mean like lighting things on fire?"

"No, dude. Matches, like fighting. Last I heard Raph was chatting Leo's ear off about submission holds or something."

"Submission? As in wrestling?"

Mikey shrugged, "I guess. They've been hogging the TV all week."

Hmm…that would explain the strange behavior. But—hold up!

" _Leo_ likes pro-wrestling?"

* * *

"I'm just saying, hardcore and first blood matches are just too brutal. I mean, one of them actually requires that you make your opponent bleed to win the match!"

"Well, duh. Why else would they call it 'First Blood'?"

Leo glared. "It's harsh and even a little sickening."

Raph harrumphed and crossed his arms. "Well nobody says they have to bleed a lot. You just have to make 'em bleed. It's a lot more impressive when they bleed a lot, though."

"You're messed up."

"It's messed up that I'm not as repulsed by blood as the rest of the world?"

"It's messed up that you like seeing people bleed."

"You're wrong, big brother." Raphael drew himself up, standing shoulder to shoulder with his grim older sibling. His muffled words floated directly into Leo's ear. "I like _making_ people bleed. People that want to hurt my family. It isn't about the blood, Leo, it's about the message: mess with my family again, and I'll take more than just blood."

Raph's bright-green eyes swept over the cityscape.

Leo stared long and hard at his brother's face. A nervous chuckle burst out into the awkward air.

"You sound like a pro-wrestler."

The smile that tilted the corner of Raphael's mouth lightened the mood.

"And as for Hardcore matches, they're fun."

"You just like watching people get beaten with chairs."

"Maybe."

"H-help! Help!"

Leo and Raph's gazes snapped down to the street below. An elderly woman was pointing her cane after a couple of young men who were running rapidly away with a bag that obviously didn't belong to them. They looked at each other. Leo's eyes held the question and Raph nodded in answer.

The thieves ducked into an alley and slowed down, which was their biggest mistake. A shadowy figure dropped down on the one carrying the bag and knocked it out of their hands. The injured thug skirted away, holding his right arm tightly to his chest as another shadowy figure dropped beside the first.

"Why don't you return that to its owner? I'll handle the small fry." Leo ordered.

* * *

Raph nodded and took off with the bag, climbing a fire escape and bounding across a few rooftops.

Several good Samaritans, including one policeman, now surrounded the old woman as she told her story. She pointed in the direction the thieves had gone and the policeman wandered off in pursuit.

Raph frowned. He couldn't let the cop reach his brother. So he did the best thing he could do: he ran ahead of the officer and dropped the bag at the mouth of the nearest alley. He pulled back and waited. After all that work to get the old lady her bag back, he wasn't about to let some other street urchin come along and pick it up.

The cop caught sight of the bag and approached it with caution. He took the bag and returned to the old lady's side, she took it gratefully.

The red-masked turtle grinned. Mission accomplished.

* * *

"Bit young to be hustling people aren't ya?"

One of the thugs, a young one with dark brown hair and a rather sad excuse for a goatee, drew a switch and pointed it at Leo. "Lay off man. You got the bag, we ain't looking for trouble."

Leo laughed, darkly. "I think the cops would agree that taking old ladies' purses is just begging for trouble…or punishment."

The injured thief, whose arm was probably sprained by Raph's attack, cowered behind the one with the switchblade. Leo hesitated to draw his weapons. These guys definitely deserved a beat-down, but cutting them up wouldn't exactly be fair. While he was still thinking, goatee-boy charged.

Leo's carapace bumped into something metal that made a loud clang. Goatee-boy made another jab. Leo reached back and grabbed the first thing he could: an aluminum trashcan lid. He pushed forward and struck the guy's hand. The switchblade fell to the ground. This scuffle had resulted in Leo emerging from the shadows. He briefly savored the look of terror and revulsion on their faces. Then he knocked them both out with the trashcan lid. Leo looked at the lid with newfound appreciation.

"Well, you've been busy."

He looked up at his younger brother, the incriminating aluminum lid still in his hands. He tossed it over to the side like a Frisbee.

Raph chuckled. "Did you enjoy it?"

"Surprisingly…yeah."

Raph smiled.

"Maybe hardcore isn't so bad after all."

The hothead's smile turned into a vicious smirk. "Just wait till you try chairs."

* * *

 **How was it? I'm just a little worried because it's the first thing I've done in a while. Review please!**


	10. Inside

**This one is for a friend of mine. If and when she reads it, she'll probably like it a lot. Buckle your seatbelts friends. Chronologically, I see this falling after the end of season 4.**

* * *

 **Ch. 10-Inside**

 _My brothers don't understand. They never will, but they don't have to be so mean about it._

 _"Stupid"_

 _"Stop being so stupid."_

 _"You're so stupid Mikey."_

 _"Mikey's so stupid."_

 _"Don't bother explaining it to Mikey, his small brain will never understand it."_

He straightened.

Let them call him stupid. It didn't matter in the end. So, he was stupid. He already knew that. He didn't need everyone to keep reminding him and he didn't need to dwell on it.

Stupid, sure, but brilliant. So brilliant no one could even begin to fathom his genius. He wasn't meant for this world. He was meant for another—an alternate dimension. He and his brothers were born of mutagen, their existence—though loosely—dependent on the Kraang.

In dimension X, Mikey was King. He knew and understood every creature from the Kraang worms to the florbengrabs, but as soon as they were back here, his brothers stopped appreciating it.

He was just stupid Mikey all over again. It wasn't fair.

Outside of dimension X, would he ever be more than just…Mikey?

A tear rolled down his face.

 _Of course not._

He sniffled.

 _"Boys, let Michelangelo play with you. It is never kind to exclude the ones you love. How would you like it if I played with him and didn't play with you?"_

 _When they were little, Splinter had always stood up for him._

 _"Raphael, keep an eye on Michelangelo. You know how he likes to wander."_

 _"Hai sensei."_

Splinter made sure that he was always watched over, protected...coddled a bit more than his brothers.

 _"It is only because you are so special, Michelangelo. You have the gift of a brilliant imagination, and an pure heart. Do not ever lose those, my son, they are what make you different from your brothers. No matter what anyone says: you are special, and I love you just as much as I love your brothers."_

But Splinter was gone now. It was just him and his brothers.

Did they understand? Did they know or realize what he was feeling? What he was going through? He doubted it. How could they? They'd never understand.

R.E.M. was right: Everybody hurts.

There weren't very many things that made Mikey feel this way. Being defeated, losing a friend, Brussel sprouts...

Well, maybe not Brussel sprouts. They were actually ok. Especially when you roasted some garlic oil and drizzled it over—

He was getting distracted.

Brothers. What to do about his brothers. Would it really matter if he did anything?

 _Yes._

Did he want to do anything about it?

 _No. Probably better to avoid that pile of worms altogether. Better to just sit here and let it all out—to stay here in bed and brood, not bothering about his brothers._

But then who was gonna make breakfast? And who was gonna greet them with smiles when they needed 'em most? Raph wasn't.

Sigh. He better get up. In the end, they were what kept him going. They were his greatest strength, his biggest weakness, and his harshest critics.

Mikey groaned and stretched. He eyed his Super Robo Mecha Force clock: 4:30am. A bit early, but that was okay. He could probably just use the extra time cooking a really complicated, lavish breakfast to justify being up.

He wasn't expecting to find the kitchen occupied.

"It's not that I don't want to help, it's that I can't afford to. You know that better than anyone. No, what you do is dangerous. You make a lot of enemies. My brothers and I have it rough as it is, okay? I'm not going to put them at risk any more than I have to. I understand your position, believe me. I'm the head of this clan now, but I can't…I can't put them at risk, Karai."

 _I can't lose them._

Leo didn't say it, but Mikey could feel it in hanging in the air as though he had.

For a moment, the orange-masked turtle wondered whether he should retreat the way he had come or charge in. Either way would most likely result in being seen, so he opted for the latter.

Leo was sitting at the kitchen table. His t-phone clunked down on the wood and he dropped his head in his hands.

"Wish you could help her, huh?"

The ninja leader jumped a little. "Mikey."

"Don't look so surprised big bro, you live in a family of ninjas."

"That was Karai."

"I heard." Mikey saw the dark circles under Leo's eyes and sighed. "How'd that go?"

"Not good. She wants our help on a covert operation to shut down her father's former smuggling deals. Real dirty jobs. These guys are A listers on some of the Feds' most wanted."

"Psh. You think we couldn't handle 'em?"

Leo fixed him with a very pointed glare. "The last thing we need right now are more enemies, Mikey."

"Yeah, I guess, but Raph's going stir-crazy down here and Donnie's drowning himself in blueprints for new projects."

"They're just coping Mikey. It's going to be okay." Leo wrapped his little brother in a hug.

Somehow, it felt empty. Mikey straightened.

"No, it isn't Leo. You know as well I as I do…they're coping just about as well as we both are. Which means they're both doing lousy."

Leo stared.

"What, you thought I couldn't tell? Despite what you guys think, I'm not stupid. Have fun deciding what to do about Karai." Mikey didn't know what he was doing. He couldn't believe he'd just talked to his older brother like that, he couldn't believe that his feet were taking him on a straight path for the door of the lair, he couldn't believe that he kept going in spite of the fact that Leo was shouting his name, but he was. Everything became surreal. Like this wasn't the world…or maybe…it just wasn't the world he was meant for.

* * *

"The Shell is all the shouting about?"

"Mikey just got mad at me, yelled and ran off without listening to reason!" Leo shouted at Raph's question, his anger and confusion getting the best of him.

"Reason? He's Mikey!" Raph retorted.

Donnie came running form the lab. "What's going on in here?"

"Mikey's run off." Raph said lowly, glaring at Leo.

"Run off? Run off where?"

"How should I know?" Leo and Raph responded simultaneously.

Donatello exploded. "You two are absolutely useless! Our little brother is out there, upset and you two want to waste time yelling at each other! Fine, have fun working out your aggression! I'm going after Mikey." He rushed out the lair door, leaving the two older turtles staring guiltily at each other.

Raphael sighed. "Alright, Leo, sit down and talk me through this thing from the beginning."

The leader nodded. They sat side by side on the couch and talked calmly, suddenly feeling closer than they had in a long time.

* * *

Being back at the old TCRI building looking for a portal to dimension X gave Mikey an odd sense of déjà vu. The majority of his mind rebelled at the thought of abandoning his brothers, but a tiny part deep inside of him just wanted to be back in _his_ dimension. The one place where he called the shots, where he knew the score. The one place where he was the genius…where no one could call him dumb. He wanted to be useful again…to be masterful again. He hadn't done his brothers any good since the last time they were in dimension X.

Finally, in a pile of discarded tech, his questing hands found what he was looking for. He pressed the button and the triangular door opened. Mikey smiled and took a step towards it…but some invisible force held him back. He couldn't fathom it. Suddenly, all he wanted more than anything was to leap into that portal…but now it was the tiny voice deep inside him that was crying out in protest.

"Well? Are you or aren't you? Better decide fast."

Mikey wheeled round.

"What are you doing here, Don?"

"Go or no, Mikey? You have to decide before I have to stop you."

Suddenly Michelangelo realized the offer his brother was making. "Donnie…"

"You wouldn't have done this—you wouldn't have gone this far unless you were truly unhappy with us. I wouldn't wish that on you Mikey." Donatello's voice cracked. Tears had started to gather in his eyes, but he turned his carapace to his brother to make sure that Mikey couldn't see them. "If you want to go, go now."

The orange-masked turtle stared into the portal…then at the back of his brother's shell. The portal closed.

Don fell to his knees. _Mikey…_

Then the portal device began to spark and fizz. The purple masked turtle turned around. Mikey stood over a cracked portal generator with his nunchaku in his hand.

"Mikey!"

"I may not be happy right here, right now. But I would never be happy without my brothers." The orange-masked turtle said, his eyes glimmering with wisdom beyond his years. He offered a hand down to his brother.

Donatello smiled and took it. As soon as he was on his feet, he yanked his little brother into a big hug. Still choked up, he wiped his eyes and cleared his throat.

"We better get home quick. I left Leo and Raph shouting at each other in the lair."

"Then what are we waiting for, Brainiac? Let's get over there before we don't have any furniture left."

* * *

Upon their return, they were flabbergasted to find Leo watching a rerun of Space Heroes with a sleeping Raph leaning on his shoulder. He gestured them both to be quiet and whispered to his youngest brother:

"Mikey, are you alright?"

Mikey smiled from ear to ear at his big brothers' positions. "Awwwwww, this is adorable."

"Mikey…I just wanted to say I'm sorr—"

"Not now, Leo. I gotta get the camera!"

"Mikey, no! Mikey! Not the camera! Mikey!" Leo whisper-yelled. Helooked hopefully—with pleading eyes—at Donnie. "Can't you stop him? Please?"

Donatello laughed and shook his head. "Sorry Leo. I think this is the day destined to go down in infamy as the day that you and Raph finally buried the hatchet."

Leo grumbled. "Far from it."

Donnie raised an eyebrow.

"Let's just say we agree to disagree." Then, in an almost inaudible voice Leo murmured, "Space Heroes is not a stupid show."

Raph just grunted in his sleep, almost as if to say "Is too."

* * *

 **I know it's been a long time. As you can probably guess my friend loves Mikey. Particularly where Mikey is brooding over something. So there you go. Well, how was it?**

 **Thanks for reading!**


End file.
